The Young Family

another book teaser

2011-11-26T16:25:00.000-08:00

so i went to my very first nanowrimo write-in today. i was nervous, didn't know what to expect, so i almost didn't. dan got home from work early, so i packed my binder of edits up and headed out.

what had i been so afraid of? it was great talking to other people who were writing like crazy fiends, just like i am. people who just...get it. they realize the passion for writing, they own their passion, just like i do. i felt immediately accepted and it really inspired me to keep on keepin' on.

Secrets of Truth
by Rebecca Young

Who says you can't go back?

After her father decides that life in Boston isn't all it's cracked up to be, Gabriella Hunter finds herself back in the small town of Hanover, New Hampshire, where she spent the ninth year of her life. Now at seventeen, she just can't seem to be able to let the friends from her past back in, not even her best friend, Cooper Linton.

Gabriella can't figure out why everyone hates Cooper and his friends, and she can't understand why Jackson Palmer is so weird around her. How much can things change in eight years?

A lot.

Chapter 5 Excerpt:

“What are you talking about, Cooper?” I was suddenly uneasy. We were out in the middle of nowhere, my cell phone was in the Jeep and the way that Cooper was acting was making me very nervous. There are a lot of things about Cooper that not many people know…things that I can’t tell you, Jackson’s voice whispered in the back of my mind.

3 AM Musings

2011-11-19T23:36:00.001-08:00

It's three in the morning.

I don't have a sick baby, I haven't been partying like a rock star, I'm not studying for a test.

So you ask, "Why, Beckie? Why are you awake at such an ungodly hour?"

I'm getting myself ready for working nights. While it's just my practicum (*scoffs*-JUST my practicum), I am thinking that this is going to help me prepare for the inevitable night shift that I will have as a new graduate after taking the NCLEX next month.

Next month? How the hell did that happen?

Yeah, nursing school (at least the associate's degree part of it) is over. I finished my last ATI test Friday, had my last final the Friday before that. Now it's onto practicum on the Labor and Delivery floor.

The hospital that I'm going to is 45 minutes away. And it's night shift. But I'm so freaking happy that I'm getting to work L & D that I don't care what the shift is! I don't care that I have to work until 0715 on my birthday, I get to help bring babies into the world! I am really hoping for a good experience, and for a chance to see that this is what I really do want to do with my life.

I'm pretty sure that it is. I went into nursing school knowing I wanted to deliver babies. I'm leaving nursing school knowing that I want to deliver babies. Granted, I've picked up some other loves too - like pediatrics, oncology and that infatuation with how much a patient craps (seriously, it's an amazing assessment).

I've made friends, I've lost friends, I've moved on, I've found myself. I've accomplished something that's pretty damn hard, with a husband and two kids depending on me.

What's upcoming in the future? I don't know. I'm hoping that I will be able to get a job here, but thanks to the 8 different nursing schools in the area, I don't know if that will happen. Thanks to compact states, I can practice in 21 other states with my South Carolina license... New Hampshire being one of those states. I'd love to get my bachelor's degree ASAP, so I'm enrolling for two classes for the spring, just English and Spanish. There's an Assessment class I'd like to take over the summer, and depending on where I end up, I'd like to start my BSN work in the fall.

My ultimate dream is to get my Master's at the University of Michigan (go blue), maybe even my doctorate- Dr. Young, anyone? I know it's a long way off, but my goal is by 35. My goal is to be out of college by the time Lindsey goes into college.

Funny how time flies, right?

Secrets of Truth - Chapter 4

2011-11-07T06:30:00.001-08:00

gooooooood morning!

i'm off from school today, snuggling up with my sick husband. the kids are off at school and i'm curled up in my pajamas watching "That's 70's Show" on netflix.

i have lofty goals of cleaning out my kid's bedroom, mopping the kitchen floor and scrubbing toilets, but for now, i'm going to sip my coffee, wrap myself in a snuggie and bring y'all the next excerpt of my book...

THAT I FINISHED SATURDAY NIGHT!

first round of edits begin today.

Secrets of Truth
by Rebecca Young

Who says you can't go back?

Gabriella can't figure out why everyone hates Cooper and his friends, and she can't understand why Jackson Palmer is so weird around her. How much can things change in eight years?

A lot.

Chapter 4 Excerpt:

Sputtering out a mouthful of snow, I looked up at Cooper who was doubled over from laughing at me. “What part of touch football is so hard for you to understand?”

“Cheat to win, baby,” he said. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine. Filthy cheater.” I spat, wiping the snow off my face.

"You missed some snow, right here…” he said, wiping his glove over my cheek. I stared into his dark eyes, so beautiful against his skin reddened from the cold. His face leaned closer to mine and he pushed a lock of hair away from my cheek. “Gabs…” he whispered, and I closed my eyes in anticipation of his kiss.

Chapter Word Count: 7828

Book Word Count: 26991

Secrets of Truth - Chapter 3

2011-11-06T07:42:00.000-08:00

Secrets of Truth
by Rebecca Young

Who says you can't go back?

Gabriella can't figure out why everyone hates Cooper and his friends, and she can't understand why Jackson Palmer is so weird around her. How much can things change in eight years?

A lot.

Chapter 3 excerpt:

I noticed that a few people were staring at us, but I couldn’t figure out why. Was it the whole “they never hang with people not in their group thing”? Cooper didn’t seem to notice, or if he did, he obviously didn’t care because he just kept walking like everything was normal. I laughed at his ability to ignore everything around him and playfully bumped into him just as we got to my locker. I was shocked to almost ricochet off him and suddenly go sprawling before he caught me around the waist.
“Gosh, you are like a human force field. I can’t even bump into you without being taken out,” I joked as I rubbed my shoulder and took off my coat.

Chapter Word Count: 5454

Book Word Count: 19163

Secrets of Truth- Chapter 2

2011-11-05T04:16:00.000-07:00

Secrets of Truth
by Rebecca Young

Who says you can't go back?

Gabriella can't figure out why everyone hates Cooper and his friends, and she can't understand why Jackson Palmer is so weird around her. How much can things change in eight years?

A lot.

Chapter 2 excerpt:

“Cooper Linton is your study partner? He talks to you?” the red haired boy at the end asked. I was pretty sure that his name was Jason.

“Um, yeah?” I said timidly. Well, we had talked about studying together. Briefly, and at some point in the future. Actually, it had been more like a thought that had occurred in passing. But why did they have to know? “Is there something wrong with him?”

“It’s just that, well, he doesn’t normally talk to anyone,” Vanessa said, dropping her voice so that I had to strain to hear her.

“Why not?” I asked, curious.

“He’s a loser, him and all those creepy friends of his. You don’t want to hang out with them…any of them. They just aren’t like us,” Ashley said, sounding snotty and superior.

Chapter Word Count: 7384
Book Word Count: 13709

I am WRITING again!

2011-11-04T08:08:00.001-07:00

It's November, which means that I'm participating in National Novel Writing Month, affectionately known as NaNoWriMo.

Working on this:

Secrets of Truth
by Rebecca Young

Who says you can't go back?

Gabriella can't figure out why everyone hates Cooper and his friends, and she can't understand why Jackson Palmer is so weird around her. How much can things change in eight years?

A lot.

Chapter 1 excerpt:

I wanted to know what had happened to my first crush…what had happened that turned him from a sweet boy who would smile at me from under his bangs to this angry man who was more complex than a thousand-piece puzzle.

I shook my head, wondering what his deal was, and then wondered why I cared. I got the things from my locker and then walked to the Jeep alone, trying not to pay attention to everyone standing around talking about me. I didn‘t understand why they didn‘t just ask? With a shiver and a sigh, I climbed in, dropped my backpack on the passenger seat, and started the car. I raised my cold hands to the vents, hoping the heat would start pumping soon. Once the car and my hands had warmed up, I pulled out of my parking spot, passing Jackson as he walked through the lot to wherever his car was. I glanced out my rearview mirror just before I pulled out of the parking lot, and saw him stop and look back at my car. I wondered if he knew it was me. Then, somehow, I figured he did.

Chapter word count: 6118

Potty Training, Day 15

2011-08-06T08:10:00.000-07:00

For the most part, potty training has been a successful endeavor. Jake is now wearing underpants during the day (except nap time) and he's using his words to tell us that he has to go.

He reminds me of a patient that I had in my first clinical of nursing school. She had the awful sensation of always needing to pee (if that happens to me-shoot me) and would scream at the top of her lungs "I HAVE TO PEE! I HAVE TO PEE!" She didn't seem to realize that she had been catheterized and in fact, did not have to pee.

Anywho, he was moved up into the 3rd level of the 2 year old class at his daycare, and he seems to be doing well there. We like the teacher a lot, and Jake seems to be very happy.

Lindsey came home, and after two days of bliss where the two kids were so stoked to see each other that there was absolutely no fighting going on, shit hit the fan. They're still happy to be together, but they've been fighting and fighting and fighting...Jake doesn't want Linds to play with the trains, Linds doesn't want Jake to touch her books or her Nintendo, they can't agree on a television show...but I'm so stinkin' happy to have both my kids with me that any hair that has been torn out has been worth it.

I passed my first RN level class. Nursing 222: the class of the devil. High-risk OB and high-risk psych together. I agree that many high-risk OB patients are also psych patients for the duration of their gestation, but why in the hell would they put those two classes together?Bottom line, the class was hard as hell and I was lucky to make it out alive. Now I move on to Nursing 224, which focuses on cardiac and GI issues. I'll be learning how to place an IV, anyone wanna volunteer to help me practice??

MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

Potty Training, Day 3.

2011-07-24T09:36:00.001-07:00

Potty training Friday was okay. We had two "accidents"...and I say "accident" because I am almost positive that my evil child just wanted to change into a different pair of Thomas the Train unders. Then my in-laws came and took him for a couple of hours and since they were going out, I put him in Pull-Ups to make it easier on them. Probably a mistake.

Day Two was so-so. He really seemed to be getting it, you know? I put Cheerios in the toilet and told him to get them. We went through only two pairs of unders, but we did run around naked for a while. When Dan came home, he was able to help out a little.

Today is Day 3. And today sucks so far. We've had too many accidents to count, and I'm pretty sure he's clenching his butt cheeks together in an attempt to not poop.

As far as Mommy goes: I haven't showered in three days, I haven't shaved, put contacts in or changed my clothes. I am resembling a hairy-pitted, stinky hippie feminist. My house hasn't been cleaned since Thursday, trash is piled up and dishes are overflowing from the sink because every single time I try to clean I hear "Mommy, I have to pee". Just during this blog post, I've been told "I HAVE TO GO POTTY!" three times.

I'm pulling my freaking hair out. I'm exhausted, I have to finish a care plan and start doing notes but I can't even get into them because Jacob's tiny bladder will suddenly give him the urge to produce urine. No lie. As soon as I sit down.

I need a drink.

Potty Training, Day 1.

2011-07-22T06:28:00.000-07:00

It's the moment that I have been waiting for since I changed my son's first meconium stained diaper. It's potty training day.

I've been through mustard, seedy breastfeeding poops. I've been through the lime green poops my son gets every time he gets a tummy bug. I've been through the corn, the watery, the varying colors (hey. honey! come look at this purple crap that Jake just had!). I've been peed on more times than I can count, been grossed out by poo getting on my hand, and now it's time to say goodbye to diapers and the inevitable bag that a mom has to carry when her child is small.

I'm armed with 14 pairs of underpants (Lightening McQueen and Thomas the Train), Cheerios for aiming practice, random treats that include some chocolate chips and Easter candy corn (what? I forgot to get a different kind of treat), Resolve for accidents that I'm sure will happen, and sheets for the furniture that I would like to sit on after this weekend is over.

Pray for me.

Psyched to be a Psych Nursing Student

2010-08-22T06:12:00.000-07:00

I'm taking a break from my fifteen bajilliion pages of care plans to update my blog. I know I should get better, but I just don't really have the TIME.

Between school, work and the kids, life is just hectic beyond belief. I'm trying to establish a routine, but I'm failing miserably. I don't know how I can make the most of my day. I need some kind of computer program or something that will give me a calendar. And I need to stop reading fanfiction so I can focus on actually doing responsible things.

I haven't been able to write very much lately. I want to, but I just don't have the energy after I've been in school, worked five hours, taken care of two kids and done two hours of homework. I don't know how I can fit it into my day.

Back to care plan. I'm hoping that I can come back on here later and update more.

YAY for a new design!

2010-06-25T10:15:00.001-07:00

My very good friend Penny did a new background and banner for my blog and I love it!

In other news, school started again, so I'm too busy studying to blog.

june

2010-06-02T13:46:00.000-07:00

three times of posting in one week is unheard of for me. just so you know.

our memorial day weekend was uneventful. dan had to work, so it was just me and the kiddos. i tried to do some cleaning, but while i was doing some organizing, jake went and dumped all the fish food on the floor and threw a matchbox car on the floor. this was after he broke a jar of green beans on the floor. so i gave up.

lindsey found her recorder. not that i had hid it from her but...well, let's just say that i hadn't gone out of my way to look for it. so she's been walking around the house alternately playing that or strumming on her guitar. i'm happy that she got the musical gene but dear god, i'd love it if she could actually play rather than just make sound.

last night some of my friends from school came over for a barbecue. dan and vanessa's boyfriend kenny braved the rain and went out to use the gas grill by the pool for burgers and dogs. i made my yummy pasta and potato salads and some corn on the cob. vanessa and kenny brought cake, bonnie, jessica and mark brought appetizers, then kristin and christie brought chips. it was great. we ate and played apples to apples until almost midnight. the potato salad was well received. it's so easy that it's pathetic and i always get compliments on it.

beck's potato salad

6-8 potatoes, peeled, cubed, boiled (about 10 minutes-ish)
6 hard boiled eggs, chopped into pieces
1 cup-ish mayonnaise (i kind of eyeball it, enough to coat)
1/4 cup mustard (again, eyeballed just until it begins to turn yellow)
salt and pepper to taste

makes about 12 servings. and 1 serving equals about 209 kcals.

so dan is at work again today and tomorrow, then we have a weekend with him all to ourselves. can't wait!

two days in a row? that must be a record.

2010-05-30T15:25:00.000-07:00

nothing has happened, it was a rainy day today, just one of those blah days where you don't want to do anything. kids played, i read a little bit, watched some tv, fooled around on the internet.

the reason i'm coming on here is to share my banana nut muffin recipe! YUM.

beckie's best banana nut muffins

Ingredients

1/4	cup butter, softened
1	cup white sugar
1	egg
3	ripe bananas, mashed
2	cups all-purpose flour
1	teaspoon baking soda
1/2	teaspoon salt
1	cup chopped walnuts

Directions

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.
In a large bowl, cream together butter and sugar. Beat in the egg and mashed bananas. Mix in flour, baking soda and salt just until combined. Mix in chopped walnuts.
Pour into muffin cups.
Bake in preheated oven for 40 minutes. If top begins to brown too quickly, decrease heat slightly. Center should be soft and chewy, while the outside, crisp and crunchy. Makes about 18 muffins

they are AWESOME, downside is one of them is 180 calories, even worse when you slather them with butter. eh. sometimes the kcals are worth it.

I forgot I had a blog.

2010-05-29T09:46:00.000-07:00

see what happens when nursing school takes over your life? you forget that you have a blog and then come on to find 33 new followers. so HI new followers! i'm glad that you found me.

we moved into an apartment a couple of weeks ago. i love it. it's nice to have all my stuff around me again. my dad and sisters came this past weekend and i thoroughly enjoyed having them here. we explored greenville, went to a drive baseball game, hung by the pool and went out for hibatchi, along many other things. it was great.

i picked up a new book to read at the pool and i'm in love with it. the series is called The Hunger Games and it's by Suzanne Collins. i really enjoyed reading about a strong and self-reliant heroine rather than a girl who is so dependent on a man to make her happy like bella in the twilight series. i also read percy jackson and the olympians while i was finishing classes, and what a great series. i love to read, so any suggestions for books would be greatly appreciated. i'm enjoying this break from school because i get to read and write for a little while.

as far as writing. i've done some stuff, but i haven't worked on my book at all. i keep meaning to, but alas, it just doesn't come. i'm about 2/3 of the way through it though. i'm sure i can finish it by the end of the year if i devote the time to it.

***

so i tried out a new recipe the other day for breakfast at dinner (aka "b at d" at our house), and it was so tasty that i'm going to share it, partly to share, but mostly so i can remember what i did the next time i make it.

beckie's breakfast skillet

6 slices bacon (i used turkey bacon and it was still tasty)
1/4 cup chopped green bell pepper
1/4 cup tablespoons finely chopped onion
6 cups cubed cooked potatoes
1/2 cup shredded sharp cheddar cheese
6 eggs
salt and pepper

in a large skillet, cook the bacon over moderate heat until crisp. remove the bacon to drain. pour off all but 3 tablespoons of dripping.

heat the drippings remaining in the pan until sizzling. add the bell pepper, onion and potatoes; cook, stirring gently, until the potato cubes are browned.

make 6 holes in potato mixture and drop 1 egg into each hole, then cover. let cook until eggs are firm (it took about 6 minutes i think). sprinkle the shredded cheese and bacon over it and cook until melted. season with salt and pepper. serve immediately. makes 6 servings.

***

my husband brought this to work the day after and he said that it heated up really well, even though i'd had my doubts. it was a win with my kids too. i just made sure to serve it with ketchup because my disgusting family members like ketchup on their eggs and potatoes *vomit*.

i'm going to *try* to blog at least once a week, but i'm not holding my breath.

March of Dimes

2010-04-12T13:50:00.000-07:00

On May 10, 2008, the scariest thing possible happened to me. Only 16 weeks into my pregnancy, I went into labor. I was immediately put on bedrest and had surgery to stitch my cervix closed. Then, on June 24, I went into labor again...at 23 weeks pregnant.

I was at a loss. I had a 4 year daughter at home, and we were all alone. Fortunately, the March of Dimes stepped up, and they gave me information about what to do to stop premature labor, options that we had, and resources for people in our position.

When I left the hospital, I was sent home with a terbutaline pump and a contraction monitor that had to be on me several times a day. I remained in bed for 6 months of my pregnancy, trying to keep my son safe. I was able to stop the medications, and I didn't have to use the monitor once I reached the "safe" point of 37 weeks, and my son Jacob was born at 37 weeks...at a whopping 10 pounds!

Thanks to help from the March of Dimes, dependent on donations for research, my son was born healthy. But millions of children born every year aren't so lucky. 1 in 8 children born in the United States are premature, and one in every two babies in the NICU won't go home. Those statistics are still too high.

I'm raising money and devoting my time to help support this amazing cause, and I'm asking for help from my friends here in the fandom. All the money raised supports MOD research and programs that help moms have full-term pregnancies and help babies begin their lives healthy. It also goes to families who need help, whose babies are in the NICU.

You can find my page at http://www.marchforbabies.org/beckiey8. Please help me thank the March of Dimes for their part in seeing my son into this world by raising money for much needed research and support that will benefit other hopeful, growing families.
~Beckie @Beckiey8

Out like a lamb.

2010-03-31T15:58:00.001-07:00

i'm embarrassed to admit that i've only blogged once this month. and that sucks. this whole new year's resolution thing is failing epically. i can only say that i'll try harder, but i'll fail. i can't help it. it's inevitable.

let's see. i'm on spring break from school this week and i'm enjoying it. we took a little mini vacation and stayed with friends up in charlotte (read: we drank way too much, sang american idol on the wii and passed out) and we made some really yummy easter rice krispy treats:

easter egg rice krispy treats (microwave)

3 tablespoons butter or margarine
1 bag of jumbo marshmallows
6 cups of rice krispies (or the store brand works great)

melt the butter and marshmallows together in the microwave for 2 minutes, stir, then heat for 1 more minute in the microwave. add the 6 cups of cereal and mix well. scoop 1/3 cup of mixture at a time onto a piece of wax paper and shape into an egg with buttered hands.

let cool for a little bit, then dip half of the egg into melted chocolate and put sprinkles on top. put them in the fridge so the chocolate to cool, then enjoy. YUM

we're just hanging around for the rest of the week. i have a to-do list a mile long, but i've been crossing things off left and right. my mother in law made dinner tonight, perhaps living with the inlaws is quite nice in some aspects :)

Pork recipe and Fall precautions

2010-03-03T04:32:00.000-08:00

I hurt myself yesterday. Basically what happened was that while carrying the baby in one hand and the computer in the other, I slipped in the mud, fell in a hole and twisted my ankle. I started to go down but I didn't want to hurt the baby so I did one of those weird try-to-save-yourself moves. And I hurt.

My ankle swelled up like a baseball, but I didn't hear any cracking or anything. I can't put weight on it and it is black and blue and not pretty. So I decided I would elevate, ice, compress...it still hurts like a bitch today. So after class i'll be heading to the doctor to make sure there isn't a fracture there.

Anywho...Tonight I will be making:

Super Yummy Pork Chops!

2 cups italian dressing

1/4 c soy sauce

minced garlic to your liking (i like a lot)

1/2 onion

1/4 teaspoon pepper

boneless pork chops

Mis dressing, soy sauce, pepper and garlic in a bowl. Brown chops in olive oil for a couple of minutes, then place in a glass dish with sliced onions. Pour sauce over top and bake at 375 for about a half an hour.

We'll be having this with some rice pilaf and yellow squash. Yummmm.

February update

2010-02-28T07:45:00.000-08:00

So today is the last day of February. Wow, times goes by quickly! It has been a really hard month. We've decided to move in with my in-laws to both save money and get some help with childcare. it's great in one way because there is always someone around to watch the kids. i don't have to worry about childcare and i know that my kids are being taken care of.

having said that, we have absolutely no privacy and i miss being able to walk from the bathroom to my bedroom nekkid. but i'll get over that.

Classes are killing me and i wonder what I was thinking when I decided to go into nursing school Care plans suck and I study ALL THE TIME. No time for anything else.

I've transferred to another Publix up here in Greenville. Dan's started a new job in a town called Cowpens, whose only claim to fame is that there was a significant Civil War battle there. Whatev. He's got his hands back on machines, that's all he cares about.

I'm homeschooling Lindsey again, and while it cuts into my day and study time, it's worth it so that she doesn't have to switch schools again.

That is all. :)

Recipe

2010-02-10T15:52:00.001-08:00

Check out what I'm making for dinner tomorrow!

Awesome Crock-Pot Pot Roast

Ingredients:

2 cans condensed cream of mushroom soup
1 package onion soup mix
1 1/4 cups water
1 teaspoon Worcestershire sauce
1/4 c red wine
1 cup beef broth
5 1/2 pounds pot roast
carrots, celery, red potatoes and sweet onion

Directions:

In a slow cooker, mix together the cream of mushroom soup, dry onion soup mix, Worcestershire, wine, broth and water. Put pot roast in crock pot and coat with soup mixture. Add in vegetables.
Cook on low setting for 8 to 9 hours.
Serve with some crusty bread...YUM.

We're moving.

2010-02-10T15:42:00.001-08:00

So Dan got a new job...again. So we're moving...again. This is the second time in six months. The job situation here in South Carolina is not pretty, so we're doing what we can to stay gainfully employed.

After many discussions we've decided to take Dan's parent's offer to stay with them while we get back on our feet. We've decided that this will help with childcare while I'm in classes, help us get rid of our debt and get us back on track. We're not putting a cap on how long we'll be there, we're simply going to see how we do.

We hate to do it, but we're not the first, nor are we the last people to move in with our parents. Life will go on and we will adjust, just like we always do.

Why is it...

2010-02-06T21:12:00.000-08:00

That is get really embarrassed when people find out that I write? I'm in the middle of writing a book right now and it's like I'm almost ashamed to admit it.

I think that it's because I put so much of myself into this story. blood, sweat and tears literally pour from my fingertips and onto the Word document. These are my characters, my plot, my surroundings...I think what I'm afraid of is something I've always been afraid of: being made fun of.

I was not a popular person in high school. Sure, I had friends, I had a couple of boyfriends. But I never felt like I fit in exactly. Always felt like I was on the outside looking in. Hell, I still feel that way most of the time, except for when I'm with my husband. I'm lucky enough that he completes me and that I don't need to fit in anywhere else.

So I decided that I don't care any more. I'm 25 years old. I'm a wife, mother, student and employee. I'm a reader, a tweeter, a facebook addict, a Twilight-aholic. I love to write fanfiction...and people think that I'm talented and enjoy what I write. I've decided since to try to use my talents in a *real* scenario. My husband is supportive of anything and everything I do, so why should I even care if someone who thinks that they know me judges me for the person that I am?

I'm a good person, a loyal friend, a caring and devoted wife and mom. Who wouldn't want to be friends with me? And sure, I write about Bella choosing Jacob instead of Edward at the end of Eclipse, but really, who the hell cares? What difference does it make? It doesn't change the kind of person that I am.

February update

2010-02-02T04:32:00.000-08:00

It's already February? What's up with that? I feel like time just flies by now. It's so unfair. I've only got 11 more months to finish my resolutions! Unfortunately the whole blogging thing seems to be an epic fail.

Maybe that can be my new February resolution.

I don't have that much crap to write about. My life is a bit depressing. Work, school, kids, husband...yeah that's about it.

Today is my Grammy's birthday! She's the big 7-0 today. I hope that she has a wonderful day and I wish that I could be there to help her celebrate. My mother is also having surgery, another reason why I wish that I could be in New Hampshire. But we made our decision to live down here so I need to suck it up.

Oh, so I'm trying this recipe today:

Pizza Tater Tot Casserole

Ingredients

1 pound ground beef
1 medium green pepper, chopped
1 medium onion, chopped
1 can (10-3/4 ounces) condensed tomato soup, undiluted
1 jar (4-1/2 ounces) sliced mushrooms, drained
1 teaspoon Italian seasoning
2 cups (8 ounces) shredded part-skim mozzarella cheese
1 package (32 ounces) frozen Tater Tots

Directions
In a large skillet, cook the beef, pepper and onion over medium heat until meat is no longer pink; drain. Add the soup, mushrooms and Italian seasoning.
Transfer to a greased 13-in. x 9-in. baking dish. Top with cheese and potatoes. Bake, uncovered, at 400° for 30-35 minutes or until golden brown. Yield: 6-8 servings.

I've got a crapload of stuff to do today, so I'll blog more tomorrow.

Happy Chocolate Cake Day!

2010-01-27T07:26:00.000-08:00

January 27, 2010 is National Chocolate Cake Day. In celebration, I will share a delicious recipe I have come across and tweeked for my own benefit.

Too Much Chocolate Cake

Ingredients

1 package devil's food cake mix
1 package instant chocolate pudding mix
1 cup sour cream
1 cup vegetable oil
4 eggs
1/2 cup warm water
2 cups semisweet chocolate chips (i use the mini ones because they don't sink)

Directions

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C).
In a large bowl, mix together the cake and pudding mixes, sour cream, oil, beaten eggs and water. Stir in the chocolate chips and pour batter into a well greased 12 cup bundt pan.
Bake for 50 to 55 minutes, or until top is springy to the touch and a wooden toothpick inserted comes out clean. Cool cake thoroughly in pan at least an hour and a half before inverting onto a plate Top with chocolate frosting, garnish with strawberries.

I've been having a lot of issues with Jake lately. He's been kind of sick, running a low fever, runny nose and cough. He's such a brat though. He's into everything, he doesn't listen when we say no...he's an extreme baby. He literally drives me insane. However, this morning I finally figured out why he was being a complete tool today: he popped through 4 molars. I bet that freaking hurts!

Jake is my high maintenance kid. Like I just had to stop blogging so I could stop him from putting his fingers in the outlet. and i just had to yell at him for pounding on the desktop keyboard. and to stop messing with my papers on the end table. and again with the keyboard. I take things away but he just finds something else to get into and then i have no idea where my shit is.

Lindsey was a good baby. She listened, stayed out of trouble, and cuddled when I wanted her to. Now I've got this hellion and I'm wondering what I was thinking.

And also wondering why when I'm away or he's napping...I miss him and just want chaos back.

Gah, a week-long fail.

2010-01-26T04:55:00.000-08:00

It has been a week since I posted. That's an epic failure on my part. In my defense, Lindsey was home sick Friday-Monday, and I had class and work. And I started reading Harry Potter fan fiction. (*sigh*)

HOW 'BOUT THEM COLTS?!?!

I am so stoked. Unfortunately I had to work so I was only able to see the last half, and even then Dan was so superstitious that I couldn't WATCH it, I had to check it covertly online. I died. I was dying the whole time and I couldn't tell him that I was looking at it or he would have beat me. So I silently cried, cheered and ultimately died. I'm desperately in love with Peyton Manning, no matter how many people tell me he is unattractive. They can all shrivel and die. Haters.

Dan and I had a *date* on Friday night. We had gift certificates to the Olive Garden but with Lindsey being sick we didn't want to go out or get a babysitter, so we got takeout. Olive Garden does an awesome takeout. We also got some snickers cheesecake from Publix. It was tasty. And doing it after the kids went to bed assured us of quiet evening. It was awesome. Having time like that lets us focus on us, on our relationship, and what's important to us.

Dan went out with a couple of friends on Saturday night so I stayed home with the kids. I needed to do some cleaning so I went to town. It's hard for me to clean our bedroom because whenever i'm home it seems like dan is sleeping. So I lit some candles, hoping that the bathroom and the bedroom would smell a little nicer when Dan got home. Then I realized that it wasn't doing a good enough job of destinking the house so I used the Lysol room deodorizer. BIG MISTAKE. I set off the smoke detectors. Not exactly sure how it happened, but Lindsey and I ran around the entire house blowing out candles and fanning the detectors. I had this fear that the fire department was gonna come busting into my house while I was cleaning in my little tank top and shorts. Luckily they didn't. Or maybe I would have had some hot firemen carrying me away. DAMMIT!

Classes are kicking my butt. There is soooo much reading and soooo much homework. I'm really fortunate that I read so quickly, but being that i'm one of those people who learn by writing things over and over, my hand is killing me. Not to mention I'm killing trees with my need for nursing.

Good news is that I was finally inspired for my book. I'm back to writing again. WOOT!

Today I'm off from both school and work so I'm doing schoolwork and housework before going to the grocery store. I'm wanting to play with playdough with Lindsey today so I need to get everything done this morning. I figure i'll even take a nap while Jake does, because I'm not sleeping well. Le sigh. There's always something, eh?

OMG SCAMPI!

2010-01-19T17:11:00.000-08:00

So I made yummy shrimp scampi and since my little sister has been begging for the recipe, I figured I would share with everyone. Everyone loves my scampi. Every time I go up to New Hampshire I end up making it for my family :)

Beckie's Super Scampi

depends on how much shrimp you have but...

2 sticks of butter
1/2 c-3/4 c white wine
2 cloves of garlic (ish)
2 T flour (for thickening sauce)
1 1/2 T scampi seasoning if you have it. if not, it's okay. still tastes yummy
41-60 count shrimp

mix together, let shrimp cook all the way through then pour over cooked noodles.

Serve immediately with vast quantities of white wine.

So in other news, I finally organized my coupons and cleaned Lindsey's room. This is big. Now I'm in the middle of writing a little something, it appears as if my writing block is over. WOOT!

Weekend Update and Recipe

2010-01-18T17:13:00.000-08:00

So Lindsey spent the weekend with her grandparents this weekend. She had Friday off from school and so we went up to Greenville and had dinner with Dan's dad befor eleaving Linds there for the weekend. Saturday morning I had to work but then I got out at 5:30, leaving Dan and I with an entire evening of...sitting on the couch and playing on the computer. Sunday I had to work from 7a-3p, so Dan got a lot of qaulity time with the boy. I came home and Dan went to sleep, leaving me with my kids. We had dinner and bathtime before Jake went to bed and Lindsey and I made a bed on the living room so we could have movie night and a sleepover. I also kept an eye on the Golden Globes so I could see this:

Anywho, I'm still taking medicine from the discomfort of sleeping on the floor. We went to a playdate today with my friends Kim, Mandy and Jen along with their kids. It was crazy and insane but so much fun. I've missed my friends a lot since we've moved to Anderson.

For dinner tonight, I made a Taco Pie. It was really good, but Lindsey was being picky because i added salsa to it and she didn't want the tomatoes. GRRRR.

Taco Pie:

Ingredients

1 package refrigerated crescent rolls
1 pound ground beef
1 jar of salsa, any temperature
1 package taco seasoning mix
1 container sour cream
1 cupshredded Mexican-style cheese blend
1 package crushed tortilla chips

Directions

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C).
Lay crescent dough flat on the bottom of a square cake pan and bake according to package directions.
Meanwhile, brown the ground beef in a large skillet over medium high heat. Add the taco seasoning and stir together well. When dough is done, remove from oven and place meat mixture on top, then layer with salsa sour cream and cheese, and then top off with the crushed nacho chips.
Return to oven and bake at 350 degrees F (175 degrees C) for 10 minutes, or until cheese has melted.

YUMMY. It was so good. I topped it with lettuce for Lindsey and Dan, then added tomatoes and black olives for Jakers and I. Jakers ate way more than his share and was all Buddha-bellied when he was done. I'll have to take a picture of the belly, it's hilarious.

So now Dan is off to work and I'm off to bed, because my glasses broke and my neck is starting to hurt from having to hover 6 inches from the laptop screen just so I can see this post. That's dedication right there.

UGH!

2010-01-15T06:47:00.001-08:00

Some of my readers may or may not know, but I've been writing for a really long time. I love to write. I write almost anything and everything. I write poetry, short stories, fan fiction, really...anything. And I've got a pretty good amount of followers for fan fiction so I know at least some people like to read what I write.

I can't write. I'm in this horrific blockage. I've tried writing different things, but I can't. I sit there for hours, staring at the empty word document. It's so frustrating...and what's worse is that I use writing as my escape, as my calm down...but this makes it so that I can't calm down. I've been a nasty bitch and evil, all because I can't write. I don't know what to do.

January 12th

2010-01-12T05:18:00.000-08:00

My first day of class was great! Since I already completed my Patient Care certificate, it looks like I'm going to be able to skip the next five week session that starts in February, meaning that I'll get to move up to the next class and graduate five weeks ahead of schedule. This is very exciting to me.

I'm already laden with homework. In crazy amounts.

Today was class picture day, so I put Lindsey in a cute little outfit and did her hair all pretty with bows. She hated it. HAHA. My girl is definitely not into the dressing up thing. I put her in dress pants...with sneakers. I wasn't willing to fight anymore.

I went to the grocery store today, spent $90, saved $87. Have to grab some stuff I forgot when i get to work tonight, but that's no biggie. I like saving all the money that I can, it makes grocery shopping almost a game. And it isn't like we don't use the food, because we definitely do! Sales=Beckie's best friend.

In honor of the great deal on chicken I got (1.99/lb!) here's the recipe of the week!

Dan's Chicken Nastiness (aka Easy Cheesy Chicken Bake)

1 pkg. Chicken Stuffing

1-1/2 lb. boneless skinless chicken breasts, cut into bite-size pieces

1 bag frozen broccoli florets, thawed, drained

1 can cheddar cheese soup

1/2 cup milk

1-1/2 cups shredded cheddar

Make stuffing as directed on package.
Mix chicken and broccoli in 13x9-inch baking dish. Stir in soup, milk and cheese; top with stuffing.
Bake at 400 degrees for 30 min. or until chicken is done and casserole is heated through.

January 11th

2010-01-11T05:36:00.000-08:00

Nursing school starts today. And I'm scared. This is the first day of my career, and i don't want to eff it up. I'm so nervous. Nursing is a big deal. I could KILL someone if I screw up. I'm going to be putting needles into people. Giving medications. Treating people. Eventually.

What the hell was I thinking?!

I might need a glass of wine and a Vicodin by the time I get home from class today.

Moving on, I lost five pounds in my bout of sickness. So I figured that this was a jumpstart to my diet and exercise regime. I took Lindsey to the gym with me yesterday, it was hilarious. While I jogged on the treadmill, she stretched and did yoga to all the posters in the complex gym. She used the treadmill too, but got very bored with it. I get bored with it too, but alas, I have to do it.

I figured that using the gym would be good for her because we can't go outside right now. It's so cold! When I brought Lindsey to school this morning, it was SEVENTEEN degrees. We might as well be in New Hampshire. At least if we were, we'd have snow.

Birthday time!

2010-01-09T05:59:00.000-08:00

Happy 28th Birthday to the love of my life!

You are the best thing that has ever happened to me and I'm so lucky that you asked me to marry you. You're an amazing father, a hard worker, and a fantastic husband. You put up with me and my crazy, and just roll your eyes at my random Twilight rants. You're supportive of everything I do and you try your hardest to give me and the kids everything that we could ever want and need. You are the sunshine to my clouds, the best part of my day. I love you more than words could ever say.

I'm sorry that you'll have to be taking care of me and the kids today on your special day, but realize that every day that you are in my life is special to me :)

kill me now

2010-01-09T05:46:00.000-08:00

two nights ago, jake was really sick. we thought that he was starting to show an intolerance for meats, but it turned out that he wasn't.

i started feeling sick around 3:00, took a nap and headed to work, still feeling nauseous. i made it 45 minutes before i had to shut down my register and dash to the bathroom. i went back and opened my register back up, with my manager's promise that i could leave at 6pm. just 15 minutes to go. yeah, i couldn't make it. so i went home and just...died. i lost count of how many times i threw up after ten...in four hours.

gastroenteritis is not my friend.

poor dan, he was so amazing. he took care of the kids, made me chicken noodle soup, emptied my yak bucket, rubbed my back...he was awesome. Lindsey was great too. she came in my room and took care of me...but mostly she sat with me, which was better than anything else. i scared Jake when i was throwing up, he started screaming.

i was supposed to work 9-5 today, but i can't. while i'm not throwing up any more, i'm really dehydrated and i just hurt. I still can't keep anything down, and part of me is afraid to try. Lindsey just started complaining about her tummy, and I am guessing that I've got a long day ahead of me.

To top it all off...it's Dan's birthday. Sigh.

Lindsey lost her first teeth!

2010-01-07T18:20:00.001-08:00

Well, it's official. My baby girl is no longer a baby girl.

Dan and I helped her this evening to get her two front teeth out. Well, I held her in my lap and tried to keep her calm while Dan got increasingly frustrated at her freaking out and covering her mouth. LOL. After much conniving and persuasion, we were able to get her to open her mouth long enough to get in there and wiggle the teeth. Both came out within 30 seconds of us getting her mouth open.

Then came the trying to get her to gargle salt water. She freaked out because she saw the crazy amounts of blood but she didn't want to gargle the salt water because of the way it tasted. She was crying over the blood, but we were able to calm her down eventually, and let her stay up.

Tonight the Tooth Fairy will come and leave two gold coins. The Tooth Fairy also leaves a really sweet note. I took it upon myself to find a picture of the Tooth Fairy and decided that it is time for me to yank my own teeth out if he'll come into MY bedroom.

January 6th-7th

2010-01-07T06:47:00.000-08:00

Well, that was an epic failure. I'm so bad at keeping my resolutions. But, I can still try to keep up. And I'm doing well with my vow to take a picture of the kids at least once a day.

Jake climbing on his Laugh and Learn front door

Lindsey shows off her super loose bottom two loose teeth.

Lindsey had school both yesterday and today. I tried to do some housework, but then I got a copy of the leaked script for Eclipse. And I spent the entire day reading it. Like...the entire day. I cleaned the kitchen. Woot. Then I had to get Lindsey and play before going to work. I worked from 5-11pm and of course, once you get home from work, you can't go right to bed.

I'm dragging today. I need to do all the work I didn't do yesterday, but here I sit on the computer. I did a little writing, a little editing, but nothing major. And where I should be doing the housework while Jake naps, I will probably nap myself, because 5 hours of sleep and the Bex do not get along.

So tonight is family fun night. We have a movie, or play games, or go out...whatever. All phones, computers, etc get turned off and we focus on what is the most important to us. Tonight we're playing Operation, a game that Lindsey got for Christmas. I'm making sugar cookies, and decorating them with parts from the game, like a bread basket, a wish bone, a funny bone, etc. Here's my recipe:

Beckie's Sugar Cookies

1 teaspoon baking soda
2 3/4 cups all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1 cup butter, softened
1 1/2 cups white sugar
1 egg
1 teaspoon vanilla extract

Preheat oven to 375 degrees F (190 degrees C). In a small bowl, stir together flour, baking soda, and baking powder. Set aside.

In a large bowl, cream together the butter and sugar until smooth. Beat in egg and vanilla. Blend in the dry ingredients. Roll rounded teaspoonfuls of dough into balls, and place onto ungreased cookie sheets.
Bake 8 to 10 minutes in the preheated oven, or until golden. Let stand on cookie sheet two minutes before removing to cool on wire racks.

Makes about 4 dozen cookies

I'm sure it will be a great time. Dan is off tonight, his work cut him to NINETEEN hours this week. I have more hours this week than he does. Ridiculous.

January 5th

2010-01-05T17:51:00.000-08:00

Tuesday, January 5th

I had the monster of all headaches today. The head pounding, vomit inducing, light sensitive migraine was the mother of all headaches. I took Excedrin, took Aleve, Tylenol, Diet Mountain Dew and a Milky Way. When all else fails, caffeine and meds are the way to go.

I wanted to get stuff done today, but for real, I could not do anything. Bend over, throw up. Spin too fast, pass out. I took a nap with Dan while Jake napped...for two hours. Still didn't help. Finally I took some DayQuil and it knocked the headache out for the most part. Can still feel it lurking, but I think that can be attributed to having two children rather than just the headache itself.

We went and spent some money at the stores with the gift certificates we got for Christmas. The kids got new shoes, Dan got the Jeff Dunham Christmas special, and now I'm off to play some Band Hero :)

January 4

2010-01-04T17:36:00.000-08:00

Today is my sister's 20th birthday! Happy birthday, Amanda Kaye. Welcome to your twenties.

Today was also Lindsey's first day back at school after Christmas vacation. That was really hard. I hated letting her go to school and it was almost like the first day of school all over again...I got teary eyed. I'm pathetic, I know.

Dan and I went to the gym so we could start our resolutions off right. Jake was a bit of an ass toward the end, but I guess I'd be bored sitting in a stroller while my parents ran around too. I bet exercise looks like fun to kids. HA! If they only knew.

After I picked Linds up from school we went to Publix for grocery shopping. I've become quite the super saver! Yesterday I bought $250 worth of groceries for $100.40. That includes buying MEAT! I'm impressed with myself. It has become a game, how much money can Beckie save this week? Dan's so proud of me, he brags about my savings to his family. I love my husband.

We took our Christmas stuff down today too. I'm happy to have my corner back, but Lindsey was pouty all evening. I wonder, would Santa come even if there wasn't a tree next year? This Christmas decorating stuff is a pain in the ass.

Happy New Year!

2010-01-03T10:40:00.000-08:00

The Young family made our resolutions this year!

Dan:
work out four times a week. (wow. he's really straining himself)

Beckie:
Lose 30 pounds by June 1st
Go to gym five times a week
Do something special with the kids once a week
Finish my book
Blog so I can remember everything I did with the kids this year.

Lindsey:
Clean room when Mom and Dad ask
Work on listening
Learn to tie shoes
Work on math and reading.

Jake:
learn to talk.

The Young Family:
eat healthier
get outside at least twice a week
be more active
have a family fun night once a week.

*******

So this is my first day of blogging. Again. Yay.

2009 was a really rough year for us. Dan had been laid off and while he was fortunate enough to find another job, he took a really big paycut. Money problems ensued, which happen to everyone at some point I suppose. In August, he was offered a better paying job in the company, and we moved to Anderson to be closer to his work...and then the job fell through. Such is our life, we supposed.

I found a job working at Publix, a chain of grocery stores. I really like my job, it's very easy and I enjoy the people that I work with. It doesn't get in the way of school and that's what matters most to me. I work about 20 hours a week, and the money definitely helps out. I was accepted into nursing school in November, and classes start next Monday. I'm very excited to begin the part of my schooling that will get me to where I need to be in my career!

Lindsey started Kindergarten this year. We started in Greenville before moving to Anderson. She loves her school, loves her teachers, but still wishes she was homeschooling with Mommy. She's been tested and reads at a third grade level and does math at a second grade level. It's so impressive to very humbling when we meet with her teachers and they tell us how amazing our daughter is.

Jake is just...Jake. He's balls-to-the-walls extreme baby. To date, he has tried to tear the Christmas tree down fourteen times. He started walking at 10 months and hasn't stopped since. He's beginning to talk and it is so funny to listen to him. He's a very structured baby. He knows when he's supposed to nap and when he's supposed to eat. Mess with his schedule and all hell breaks loose.

I'm hoping that blogging will help to remind me what has happened in my life. I feel like so much time passes by me! Before I know it, my children will be grown and I'll be left here wondering what the hell happened.

Being a Mom...

2009-07-06T07:16:00.000-07:00

is one of the strangest experiences I have ever had. Now, don't get me wrong. I love my kids. I love them more than anything in the entire world and I am so lucky to have them.

But last night, while I was showering the poo off me from Jake's most recent blowout, I realized that being a mother is the most disgusting and thankless job ever.

Think about it.

When you are a mom, you have to clean poo, puke, pee and any other bodily fluid from your child. You have to change diapers. You have to feed them that vile smelling baby food. You have to clean their rooms, their messes, them...all for no pay and no thanks.

So I got out of the shower, toweled off, got in clean clothes, and the baby spit up all over me.

FRAKKING HELL.

Now, I know that being a mother is also a rewarding job. I have enjoyed watching Lindsey grow up before my eyes, and I am lucky enough to stay home with her and watch her become an amazing child. She is awesome and I love her more than I ever thought was possible. I also enjoy watching Jacob discover the world around him. He's at that stage that everything is super cool and intriguing. I delight in watching him crawl and learning to stand up by himself.

Truly, there are more good days than bad days.

Having said that, my son just had another poopy blow-out and blew a raspberry when he had a mouth full of butternut squash so I am not smelling the best. Add on to that the scent of sweat from my workout and I'm thankful that I don't know any of my neighbors who were outside when I went out for my newspaper.

Life Goes On

2009-06-30T17:39:00.000-07:00

Even though my life is depressing at the moment, I am reminded that I am better off than so many people. I look at my kids and I remember truly how blessed I am to have them in my life.

Lindsey is amazing. She's so smart. She is reading very well and writing almost as well. She kind of has her mama's bad handwriting. :) She lights up when it is time for her lessons. She likes math much more than reading and writing though. That must come from her dad, because it definitely isn't from me. We've started on simple multiplication, and she seems to be getting it quite well. Tonight was her last night at soccer. She is so good at sports. She really enjoys being outdoors and active, and I hope that this continues. Jake and I really enjoy going out every Tuesday night and watching her. Her favorite activity right now is swimming. I've finally relaxed a little and now I don't have a heart attack every time she goes underwater. Her lung capacity is pretty amazing, and she's learned how to flip underwater! I didn't learn that until I was like, in fourth grade :) Her newest favorite food is a *walking taco*, with tortilla chips, taco meat, lettuce, cheese and sour cream. She's been helping me cook lunch and dinner, and is very...imaginative in the kitchen :)

Jake is a great baby. For the most part. He's still pretty fussy. Fussier than Lindsey ever was, and I thought she was bad. But no matter how long he cries for, when I pick him up he gives me this huge one-toothed smile that makes it all worth it. He started crawling on father's day, which was a nice present for Danny. He does the army commando crawl and his knees look all raw and swollen, but he doesn't mind. He'll crawl very quickly to any food or his sister's racecar slippers! He's been trying new foods too. He's eight months old, and I find that with the second child, I'm a little more lax than I was with my first. He's had some foods that I've mashed up, like corn, and blueberries, and he LOVES it! Still not a big fan of green vegetables, but there isn't much food he'll turn away. Except for turkey. He doesn't like baby turkey. It DOES smell pretty vile, so I can only imagine what it tastes like :) He weighed in at 18 pounds at the doctors office last week, but he'll have an appointment on the 21st and they'll let us know how he's doing as far as percentiles.

Dan and I are doing ok. Dan's been working a lot and I've been enjoying my first summer off since I've started college. I'm struggling to keep the house clean with Jake being mobile now. Lindsey's never really had to worry about small toys, so I'm constantly reminding her or picking up after her small toys. I'm staying busy with the mom's groups that I am a part of. I'm really lucky to have them. My best friend is about to have a baby, so I'm anxiously awaiting being the one in the waiting room versus being the one in the hospital bed.

Keeping hope that things are going to turn around soon. God doesn't give us more than we can handle, and I trust that He will continue to watch over us.

I'd blog more...

2009-06-23T07:47:00.001-07:00

but my life is kind of depressing at the moment. I mean, will I really want to look back on this period of my life? I mean, it's the same ol', same ol'.

When Dan got laid off in January, it was a hit to his self-esteem, and a huge hit to our financial status. We had gotten pretty well situated, things were good until that. Luckily, we had put a good chunk in our savings, and figured taht the lay-off couldn't last much longer than May...right?

WRONG.

It is now the 23rd of June. The savings is gone. Dan was actually offered a job at the company that laid him off as a forklift operator, but he took a THIRTY THREE percent pay cut. We're losing over 1200 dollars a MONTH. So, now that the money is gone, what do we do?

I got put on WIC back in April. With me breastfeeding, this gives us milk, cheese, veggies, etc to help alleviate the monetary stress of feeding the family. But it wasn't enough, so I sucked up my pride and went to DSS for food stamps. I got there and looked around, thinking "I don't belong here!" but in all essence, I suppose I do. I feel like I'm justifying my decision when I say that the food stamp program was meant for people like us, people who are having a hard time, who don't plan on living off the system. We only need it for a little while, until Dan can start working as a process tech again and get us back that 1200 a month.

So I'm there, and the case worker tells me how much we'll be getting per month, and it will really help us a lot. I won't have to stress over feeding my family. HOWEVER, they told us that we'd be getting our EBT card at the beginning of the month. But it hasn't come, and my case worker isn't answering my phone calls. I've been trying to call since the 6th. Finally, yesterday, I got the number for a supervisor at DSS.

"Your complaint will be dealt with in the order in which it was received. You will be getting a phone call or a letter within the next two weeks, after we have researched your complaint."

Shit, man, what do I do until then? If I had the money to pay for groceries, don't you think I'd be using it? I need that money to feed my children! I'm feeling desperate. I don't know what to do, I don't know where to turn. I feel like I'm drowning and I don't know if we'll ever bounce back.

Updates

2009-06-07T16:22:00.000-07:00

I haven't been blogging lately because there isn't a lot going on. We went to JAX to see my sissie Jessi at the end of May, and had the best time. I'm already searching for hospitals I can work at once nursing school is over. I would love to be close to her again. I'm reminded how truly blessed I am to have such wonderful siblings.

Came home to a third ear infection in a month for Jacob. Two rounds of antibodics didn't work, and he actually developed the third one while on the second round of amoxicillin. Very frustrating. No wonder he's been so unhappy, his little ears hurt!

Jake cut his first tooth on Thursday! It has been a LONG time coming, but it finally poked through, bottom right tooth. The bottom left tooth is close behind it. We started Jake on meats for the first time this week. He hates them! HATES them. I have to mix them with fruits to even get him to swallow them, but he scrunches up his little face like, ewwwww, you're making me eat this?? it is kind of funny. He also refuses to eat green vegetables, so I have to mix them with carrots.

Lindsey was sick yesterday. Really sick. She had a temp of 103.5 for over five hours, and it wasn't coming down with meds. It finally broke in the middle of the night, but the poor girl kept throwing up every fluid we tried to get into her. But today, she's all better.

I've resolved to lose at least fifteen pounds. I started on May 28th, and I've already lost EIGHT pounds! I'm working hard on it.

Other than that, just lots of playgroups, homeschool lessons and general fun here!

leaving for a bit

2009-05-21T04:26:00.001-07:00

I'm heading to Jacksonville to visit Jessi (my little sister) but I'm going to try to ipdate with some info and some pics next week after I get home. Promise.

How 'bout them apples?

2009-05-12T08:48:00.000-07:00

Lindsey is a helpful sister. She likes to do things for her baby brother, especially feed him. So this morning, I told her that she could feed Jakers, and I made up the applesauce with rice cereal. I put the bowl on his tray, and she started feeding him. A friend called, and so I went into the living room to answer, though it was a short conversation. I checked on the kids, they were doing fine, so I went into the bathroom to clean the toilet. Lindsey comes in to tell me that she's done feeding Jake, and I told her I'd be right there to clean it up, as she normally knows to put the bowl in the sink.

Well, when she said she was done feeding him, it wasn't that he was FINISHED...it is that she was DONE feeding him. She didn't want to do it any more. So in the minute that it took me to finish scrubbing and wash my hands, Jake had taken his bowl that Lindsey had left on his tray and dumped it over his head. Applesauce was everywhere. In his hair, his ears, his tray, his high chair...everywhere. He was covered in applesauce. Oh I was so mad. I sent Lindsey to her room and had to hose down the boy, who nows smells a little like apples.

Now I'm craving pie :)

Tonight is the Greenville Technical College Graduation. Tonight I will finally have something to show for the past three years of busting my butt. Very rewarding. Dan, the kids and my in-laws are coming. I know that this isn't a big deal, not like my nursing degree, but I really wish my mom and dad were here. I miss them...I feel like they should be here for this, because it is every bit an accomplishment for them too. Sometimes I wish I didn't live so far away. :(

I'll post pictures tomorrow.

Happy Anniversary, my love!

2009-05-11T16:06:00.000-07:00

Six years ago today, I married the man I want to spend the rest of my life with. When I try to put an amount of time that we've been together down, it doesn't seem right. It seems like Dan has always been a part of my life. We met in an odd way, I was dating the brother of his girlfriend. We became fast friends, which was kind of strange, because I never really hung out with anyone like Dan. We played video games and watched movies. We went to the races at Twin State Speedway. We'd hang out when we were with our respective partners, but we'd normally plead exhaustion and leave...just to go and hang out together. I really loved hanging out with him.

Then about 10 months after we met and started hanging out...Dan laid it out. He liked me. More than he should. This weirded me out. I thought about it though, and I realized that I felt the same way. He asked me if I wanted to talk about it, and I said no. :) I was worried about how I felt, especially since we were still dating our partners. A couple of weeks later though, we had broken up with them, and I moved in with him. The rest, as they say, is history.

Dan asked me to marry him on February 13, 2003 and we were married on May 11, 2003. I couldn't have asked for anyone better. We work so well together, we balance eachother out happily. We may not have lots of money, but we make up for it with love :)

Me and my honey April 2009

What is WRONG with me?

2009-05-08T07:06:00.001-07:00

If I didn't know better, I'd think I was pregnant.

My hormones are out of control! Maybe it is the breastfeeding, with the hormones being still floating around in my body, maybe I'm just freaking going insane.

I don't even like being in my own body. The thoughts that I have been having just aren't healthy. I don't like myself, I don't like my husband. I'm frustrated with my kids (though you'll notice that I still like my kids). My temper is super short, I flare over the littlest thing. I'm frustrated over several situations in my life. I'm frustrated with some of the people in my life.

I miss my family. I miss my sisters especially. I want to find a job, but for the life of me, I can't get a call back---though I have got some pretty promising automated responses. Then part of me doesn't want to find a job, because I want to be with the kids. But if I don't find a job, there isn't enough money to go around. We are starting to sink...and I don't know how to stop that.

I'm going to try to stop the pity party, and remind myself that today is a new day.

Puddle Stomping.

2009-05-06T13:06:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was cinco de mayo! We celebrated by doing a craft, going to the library to read books about Mexico, having a Mexican dinner (mmm quesadillas and tacos!) and finishing off the evening at Janna and John's house for margaritas. Very fun. Lindsey and I had run to Bi-Lo to get stuff for dinner and got caught in a rainstorm. She giggled the entire jog from the store to the car. We were soaked! I always try to remember that when you're five, one of the best things in the world is splashing in puddles.

I always want to be the kind of mom who will stop what she is doing and stomp in the puddles.

It is really starting to hit me that this is the last summer I have with my child before school corrupts her and she realizes I'm not the coolest person in the world. It makes my heart physically hurt knowing this. So I'm working hard to do lots of fun things with her before I have to send her off to kindergarten.

Today is Lindsey's favorite stuffed animal (Rabby)'s birthday. We made cupcakes, made presents, decorated her room and had a tea party. I'm currently enjoying "Best Mom in the World" status.

And that heartache lives on...

Just another Manic Monday...

2009-05-04T16:31:00.000-07:00

This morning, we went to a playdate at the park with a group I just rejoined since stepping down as Organizer of the GAMM. It was fun...and the biggest perk? Not having to host it. I was able to just watch my kiddos and not have to introduce everyone and be the gracious hostess. I could get used to the anonymity that comes with not organizing a group.

It has been raining on and off all day. We hurried to leave the park so we wouldn't get caught in the rain, but I had to stop at Bi-Lo for some good BOGO deals. I found eggs for 88 cents too, so that was egg-citing...HAHA. (Sorry, I couldn't help myself). We spent the rest of the day @ home, and I even got to nap for an hour and a half...we all did!

We were supposed to go to Twilight Tales tonight, but Lindsey started coughing up a storm. I think that I was fooled though. She hasn't coughed since I told her we could stay home. I think she just really wanted to stay home with her daddy. Dan is helping me with some chores which makes for a happy wife.

Tomorrow is a busy day with Cinco de Mayo...Ole!

Whew...I almost forgot.

2009-05-03T16:30:00.000-07:00

I almost forgot to blog. I'm so proud of myself for remembering to come on here and blog! Last night we ended up watching Peter Pan. It is always so much fun spending time with my family...it doesn't really matter what we do.

Right now I'm trying to write a fiction piece. It is a lot harder than I thought it would be. I've got some parts in my mind, and I'm just trying to put all these thoughts on paper (ok, computer) and make it mesh together. I've always wanted to write, and while I have good ideas, I just never can get it out right. So we'll see how this one comes out. It seems promising. I don't really know the process after writing, but I'll worry about that step when I get to it. I need to get the creative juices flowing tonight. I plan on putting Lindsey to bed early and going to town on the laptop.

Speaking of Lindsey and bed, we're having a hard time with her wetting the bed. She's wet the bed four times this week. She didn't have any accidents when we were in Florida, and the week before FL, she had two accidents. This is really unheard of for my child. I can't think of anything that could have happened, or why she is doing this. I'm starting to think that she might have a UTI or something. We're going to not let her drink anything after 1900, and put her to bed at 2100. I think she might be staying up too late, and that she is too tired to wake up in the night to go to the bathroom. I don't want to put her in diapers or anything...because I don't feel like that actually TEACHES her anything. She gets frustrated with herself, and I'm frustrated too. I feel like I am doing something wrong. We'll see how this goes. If anything, it will be some extra time to myself!

Operation Fatten Baby is going well. Jake really will eat almost anything I try to stuff in his mouth...except GREEN BEANS. He hates them. At least he looks handsome covered in carrots. He's still doing a really good job with nursing, so I think that he should have gained some weight when we see the doc again on the 19th.

I'm going to try to do some more writing before the bedtime rituals begin in about a half hour. Here's hoping we stay dry through the night!

I've got it!

2009-05-02T13:28:00.001-07:00

Today was my last clinical for Patient Care, and I have the certificate in hand...I am now a Patient Care Tehcnician! How cool is that? Now I'm trying to find a job, and it is proving to be harder than I thought it would be. Hopefully I can get everything to pan out the way I want, because I really REALLY need a job. I mean, the nursing program won't start until January, what am I supposed to do until then?

I was out at 1, and my mother in law had taken Lindsey to a tea party, which was really neat for Lindsey. We've been hanging out for the day, and I'm happy blogging while Dan plays SimCity 3000 on the desktop. Lindsey is bouncing off the walls and desperately wants to play on the computer...but Dan doesn't wanna hand over the desktop. He's selfish.

I'm trying to figure out what I want to do for the evening. With trying to save money, we've been staying home, but MAN that gets pretty boring. I really want a nap but it is 1640 and that's waaaaay too late for me to nap. I'll never go to sleep tonight! I've also got to figure out what to do for dinner. Again, trying to save money, so we've been trying to actually EAT what is in our cupboards. Imagine that, eh? I think I'll just thaw some meat and make hamburger helper.

Dan watched Lindsey and that starting-to-get-fat baby of mine this morning. So that means that Jake got fed one thing of baby food and he probably didn't get fed any baby food for lunch. YOU CAN NEVER COUNT ON ANYONE TO DO IT LIKE YOU CAN! I mean, I left a note with times and everything. HOW CAN YOU MESS THAT UP?! Grr.

I'm considering re-reading the Twilight series again. I do it about once a month. Admittedly obsessed with these books. I have so many ideas for books floating around in my head, and I would LOVE to actually get one out. I've started one, and we'll see how it pans out. Maybe if I could write a book like Stephenie Meyer, I wouldn't have to work. *SIGH*

Time's up...back tomorrow. Three days in a row...call me butter, I'm on a roll!

Day 2: Rough going.

2009-05-01T06:59:00.000-07:00

So it is Day Two of Operation Fatten Baby. Yesterday I lost many a good shirt to the enemy fire of butternut squash. Thank God for Shout! Like I said, Jacob doesn't really like food of the baby kind. He basically wants to sustain life with boob milk. Which wouldn't be a huge deal if the child actually would spend time eating instead of getting on there for five minutes, then losing interest and playing for a little while, then expecting to be able to come back to it. I'm not a freaking cow for God's sake. Today so far has been a little better, instead of breakfast taking a half hour, it only took twenty minutes, so I'm taking that to be a good sign.

Last night our family went to the Bos family's house for dinner. Janna and John made yummy steak and potatoes, which is a real treat for us because we never have steak. We like steak, but let's be honest here, my husband can not grill worth crap. Hot dogs, the occasional hamburger, yes. Steaks? Not so much. It was a nice evening spent with good friends---and good wine too! AS the girls get older, we're finding that they get along a lot better and play nicer.

Today is a lazy day so far. It is 1005 and we're still in our pajamas. Lindsey is wanting to play on the computer, but I told her that I had to blog first. That, in turn, set off a whole bunch of questions (what's a blog? what do you write on there? can I do it?) that took time out of my blogging!! Grr. Both my kids are being quite needy today. Dan just went to sleep and is planning on napping until 1, then we'll have time together as a family.

The weather is looking a little iffy today. I was kind of hoping that we could play in the baby pool on the back porch but I don't think it is going to happen. I'm really hoping to get a move on with Jacob's scrapbook, and to start Lindsey's fifth year scrapbook (from her 4th birthday to her 5th). Unfortunately with the bed rest, that will be a small scrapbook. :( We're going to try to see my friend Kim and her kids today...with our schedules it is hard for the two of us to get together. Then it is movie night tonight. Who knows what we'll be watching but we pile all the blankets and pillows in the house on the living room floor and cuddle together with a movie. It was one of our favorite pre-Jake things to do and now we're hoping to re-incorportate it into our lives.

So I'm proud of myself for taking the time this morning to blog...two days in a row...WOOT!

Day 1: Operation Fatten Baby.

2009-04-30T11:06:00.001-07:00

So, yesterday I took Jakers to the pediatrician for his 6 month check up. He now weighs in at 16 pounds, 11 ounces. He's 27.5 inches tall and his head is 17.25 inches around.

His height is in the 85th percentile, his weight is in the 30th percentile and his head is in the 47th percentile. Everything but his height has dropped significantly.

And he has an ear infection.

Poor bean.

So, Dr. Parker (fantastic doctor, I absolutely adore her) handed me a scrip for amox (actually, she faxed it in to Publix---did you know that they do FREE amoxicillin? WOOT) and told me that she was a bit concerned about Jake's weight. She told me that she wants me to breastfeed him every four hours and she wants Jake to eat baby food three times a day. Cereal and fruit in the am, fruit and veg in the afternoon and a meat and veg at dinner time. Can you say piggy boy? If he hasn't caught up in 3 months then we might have something to be concerned about. And she wants to see him in 3 weeks to see how his ear is.

I have a schedule on the fridge that shows the time that I will be feeding my baby boy. And when he gets his meds so I won't forget.

I wish that he liked food more. He has absolutely no interest in baby food. I wish that I had that problem. :)

Starting anew.

2009-04-30T11:05:00.000-07:00

Okay, this time, I really mean it. I will take fifteen minutes a day and blog. I mean it.

Poor Little Man...

2009-02-24T12:01:00.000-08:00

Jake is covered from head to toe in eczema! My poor guy. We're headed to the doctor tomorrow morning at 9:45. He is very unhappy. I'll update tomorrow with how he is doing. I'm doing all that I can to keep him slathered up with lotions and diaper cream (since the rash is also in his diaper). Lindsey is trying to help keep him from crying with dancing around the house and being silly but it is making me a little crazy.

With Dan working third shift now, I try really hard to keep the house quiet so he can sleep, but my two wonderful children do not LIKE to be quiet. Dan's a pretty sound sleeper though, so I suppose it's all good. I really hate him being on third shift...not because of the hours, but because he is so unhappy in this position. I hate my husband to be unhappy. But he does what he needs to to keep us afloat. But I am doubting that he will be able to do it for much longer. I'm just trying to remain supportive and loving :)

Lindsey is obsessed with the TV. Movies, TV, video games, whatever. And I'm having a hard time breaking her away from it. Today she has watched 1 movie (while my MIL was here watching the kids while I was in microbiology) but that is it. She doesn't have to be so attached to the damn thing. I'm half tempted to get it out of the freaking out but I think my husband would divorce me. haha. So, I've taken to only allowing it during certain times. I'm the TV Nazi.

I'm off to go do some studying, I have a big microbiology test on Thurs that I am only somewhat prepared for...but I wanted to update :)

Quick hi

2009-02-22T07:42:00.000-08:00

Everyone is doing great---so busy I can't see sraight.

Volunteering @ hospital today for first time...nervous!
Dan hates third shift, we can't wait until it picks back up again so he can have his job back!
Lindsey growing quickly, learning new things every day!
Jake is a handsome boy, his laugh is amazing!

Will update a little more soon!

Living in Fast Forward

2009-02-07T10:12:00.001-08:00

Life is going by so fast. Between classes, Dan working, the kids, and clinicals starting, I have been a busy, busy woman. Things are going ok. Dan really does not like this new position with his company, but apparently it is temporary, so I hope that it is.

Classes are going well, I really enjoy patient care and I've made friends within the class that I enjoy being around four days a week! Microbiology is hard, but I am actually enjoying the information that I am learning. Genetics is super cool :)

Lindsey is almost done with her reading lessons! I'm very proud of her. I hate that I can't devote as much time to her, and I'm afraid that she will resent her brother, but unfortunately I just can't do it all. Jake has been grumpy lately because he is trying to tell us that he doesn't want the bottle, but unfortunately, Mommy can't be with him all the time, so he has to deal with it! He has the most amazing laugh that I take advantage of at any time possible.

Today I am going to try to do some scrapbooking done, go take the kids to the park, take a nap, and enjoy time with my hubby. Tomorrow I am volunteering at the consignment sale with Janna, and Dan begins third shift. Ugh. Hopefully it won't be too long.

I'm a terrible person, I know.

2009-01-31T03:11:00.000-08:00

So I know I promised an update two weeks ago, now I'm finally getting to it. I have been really busy with school. I knew it would be hard, but not THIS hard! Microbiology is kicking my butt. There has been a LOT going on in our household lately.

Dan got laid off this past Monday. Which was a blow to his ego. He's been there for almost two years, had seniority over four people, and HE is the one to get laid off. Our hearts hurt. However, on Wednesday his work called back and offered him a position at their warehouse driving a fork truck. While he takes a pay cut, he is still employed, which is saying more than thousands of other people in the country. We'll just have to scrimp and save as much as possible. I'm going to try to get a job and help out. How I'll do that going to school full time and breastfeeding a baby I don't know, but I'll figure it out!

Lindsey is doing amazingly well. I signed her up for kindergarten on the 16th, and she is very excited. She loves school, so I feel bad about homeschooling her, but it is just so much easier to homeschool at this point in time, not to mention so much cheaper. She's doing well on her reading lessons, and she is so smart. We went to the park yesterday and let her run off some energy. We hate being cooped up in the house during the winter!

Jake is growing so fast! He is 3 months old. When I took him to the doctor at the beginning of the month he was 13 pounds, 5 ounces and I weighed him yesterday and he was 15 pounds. I'm happy that he seems to be growing well. His smile lights up the room and his giggle is one of the most beautiful sounds I have ever heard in my life. He is such a little flirt! He will smile and cock his head to one side, acting all coy. Very sweet. He's also teething, which is not fun. The poor lil man has got some swollen gums, and a tooth trying to poke through. Poor Jake. Poor Mommy's boobs. haha.

I've been sick since Monday. Sinus infection and ear infection, and I'm still pondering going to the doc to get checked for strep. Ewwww kill me now. I'm so uncomfortable that I can't sleep, so that is why I am blogging at 6:20 in the morning.

So my goal is to get a little better about blogging, but please be patient with me and the insanity that is my life :)

Update soon.

2009-01-13T11:44:00.001-08:00

I have had classes all day, and have class tonight, but I will update tomorrow. Promise.

What have I gotten myself into?

2008-12-23T17:45:00.001-08:00

I just checked my Campus Cruiser for school. It's like Greenville Tech's website for students. Anywho. I'm all signed up for my classes. And I'm scared. Here it is:

Microbiology: Tuesdays and Thursday starting the 13th of January and ending on the 8th of May: 11:00-1:45 at the Barton campus.

Basic Patient Care: Mon/Tue/Thur starting the 12th of January and ending on the 16th of February: 5:30pm-9:30pm at the Northwest campus.

Basic Patient Care II: Mon/Tues/Thur starting the 17th of February and ending the 23rd of March: 5:30pm-9:30pm at the Northwest campus.

Phlebotomy: Mon/Tues/Thur starting the 24th of March and ending the 4th of May: 5:30pm-9:30pm at the Northwest Campus

PCT Clinicals: Saturdays starting the 7th of February and ending the 2nd of May: 8:00am-4:00pm.

AM I INSANE?! Add on to that: I am the mother of 2 kids, one of whom is a lactose-intolerant breastfeeding infant, the other who is a clinger on her mommy. I am a housewife, so I am still expected to clean the house, cook the meals and take care of everything that needs to be taken care of. I am also an organizer for a mom's group...which takes up more time than one would expect. And I am a best friend to many.

Dan better not be expecting me to have sex too. Because I don't know if I will be able to stay awake.

You're a mean one...

2008-12-21T18:13:00.000-08:00

Mrs. Grinch...

When I was little, I used to love Christmas. I loved everything about Christmas.

Now that I am the mom, Christmas sucks.

I finally have realized how commercialized Christmas is. It is disgusting. I've come to hate everything about Christmas. I hate the baking, the buying, the wrapping, the mess, the traveling, the whole idea of Santa Claus.

This year has been especially hard. I don't know why. Last year was fantastic (save for the fact that we were in SC rather than in NH). I guess I'm not in a Christmas-y mood. Maybe it is because I am so freaking tired. Maybe it is because there just isn't enough money to go around. All I know is that this year...Christmas blows.

I need a Valium and a glass of wine.

It is true...

2008-12-19T13:21:00.000-08:00

My son is lactose intolerant. Apparently the doctor figured with all the signs and symptoms I was telling her about that he can't be subjected to cow's milk. And since I am a breastfeeding mom, that means that I can't be subjected to cow's milk. And I can't be subjected to sugar either, so I am just totally shit out of luck!

So I have been trying to figure out what we can eat as a family and I have a small list of things that do not have cheese or milk, or butter in them. I'm also supposed to stay away from prepared breads and such. This isn't fair!

After the hellacious pregnancy I had, don't you think I could GET A BREAK?! Apparently not.

I figure that I will be able to lose weight pretty quickly though, if I can't eat cheese. Cheese is my life. LOL. Without cheese, there is no pizza, no mac and cheese, no cheese bites, no lasagna, no manicotti...no CHEESEburgers!

Like I said, I'll be skinny in no time.

Today I have had oatmeal and soup. That's about it. Some cashews. I've got to go to the grocery store so I can buy some food that I can actually eat and not make my boy sick.

UGH---I should have waited until after the holidays to have him checked...no Christmas cookies! LOL.

Blech

2008-12-17T11:19:00.000-08:00

The yuckiness wreaking havoc on Greenville has found me, I think. I woke up this morning feeling kind of yucky, but attributed it to lack of sleep, since Jake had ANOTHER really bad night. But I got progressively worse through the morning and decided to cancel my craft day at my house :(

I'm just achy and yucky feeling. I have a nasty headache and a hacking cough. I just feel like butt. And I'm still dealing with a yakking baby. Poor lil guy.

As far as his throwing up goes, I'm beginning to wonder if he has an intolerance to milk. He throws up a LOT, has diarrhea, is gassy and bloated and he wheezes, which is kind of scary. So I did some research and am going to *try* to cut milk out of my diet to see if it helps him at all. This past weekend we gave him some formula-laced breastmilk and you would have thought I was feeding him poison with how much he was spitting it out. Jakey obviously does NOT like the formula. It is noted for next time.

So for the next week I am going to *try* to cut all dairy out of my diet. It sucks already, because dairy is basically the main food group for me. I had oatmeal for breakfast (made with water---ewww) and chicken and rice soup for lunch. No grilled cheese with it :( Perhaps I will lose some weight though.

Speaking of, at the doctor's appointment yesterday, Dr. Smith cleared me for diet and exercise, in fact, he insisted on it, thankyouverymuch. Well, shit. Guess I'll start after the new year!

My baby is a grump.

2008-12-14T19:12:00.000-08:00

Jake has been grumpy all day. He has not slept for more than 45 minutes at a stretch. Both Dan
and I are exhausted.

Part of it could be that I was drinking last night so no boob milk for the boy, only formula. And that shit smells like dirt. It is nasty.

Another issue could be gas. His tummy is really bloated, so I have been giving him Mylicon drops which don't seem to do any good for him. His reflux medicine is so nasty that he spits it up most times, which I can't say that I blame him.

Finally, it could be the fact that this little boy insists on being held at all times. Like I am currently typing around my child. Poor guy. My back hurts from carrying him everywhere I go.

But he is so damn cute. I mean, I may be biased and all, but this is one cute baby. He's starting to fatten up a little bit, so he's not so chicken-y (is that a word?! Not chicken-like?). His head is perfectly shaped (weird compliment I know, but still) and he's really proportional.

It is so weird to actually have a kid who is on the high side of normal rather than just a mammoth of a child. Lindsey was in the 99th percentiles for everything, whereas Jake is in the high 70s, low 80s. These two kids are different from eachother in every way.

I feel like I am truly blessed to be able to experience the lives of these two amazing kids. Though tonight they are being the world's biggest buttheads, they are MY babies and I am so lucky to have them both.

When Mom asks for an update, you know it is bad.

2008-12-12T06:00:00.000-08:00

I got an email from my mom yesterday that said that I needed to update my blog. Sorry mommy. I suppose it is a way for my mom to finally read my diary!

Anyhoo. So, I've been busy with two kids. Life is insane. It might not be so bad if I didn't have two very demanding children. Well, what can you expect with such a high-maintanence momma? Lindsey absolutely loves being a big sister. She hovers :) but that is okay. She adores her baby brother and wants to be with him all the time. Jake is growing very quickly. He went to the doctor last week and he weighs in at 11 pounds, 10 ounces now. He's also grown 2 inches and is now 23 inches in height. Jakey was also diagnosed with acid reflux and is now taking medicines to help him be not so grumpy.

My birthday was on the 1st of December. I'm 24 now. Not really a big deal I suppose. Dan and Lindsey made me breakfast and dinner on the Sunday after my birthday. On my actual birthday I sat home with my kids---my best friend Stephanie brought me cake and trick candles. 24 candles really brings on a lot of smoke.

I went out to see Twilight for the second time with my friends. I truly LOVE this series of books. If I could do anything in the world, I would love to be an author, but I just can't be creative enough to do something like that.

Ok---so moving on...we decorated for Christmas this past weekend. We love the tree that my grandparents gave us. Lindsey enjoyed decorating and putting ornaments up. I made cookies and we listened to Christmas music. Then on Monday we had a playdate here. Wednesday night we had some friends over for dinner, playtime and wine, of course! Last night my in-laws came over to see their grandkids.

On Wednesday I got the call I had been hoping for...I had applied to the PCT (patient care technician) program at Greenville Tech but I had been put on the waiting list, and told that I most likely would not get in because how far I was down the list. But the counselor called me and let me know that while i didn't get into the morning program like I had been hoping to, I did get into the evening program. So I am going to be in class Monday, Tuesday and Thursday nights from 5-10 for a couple of months, also doing clinicals on Saturdays from 8-4. My life will be crazy for a little while. I'm fortunate enough to have my in-laws to watch my kids and let me use their car so I can pursue my education. I am so excited to do this!

Today is Friday, I don't know what we are doing tonight. Either we'll stay home, or we'll get together with Janna and her girls, since Janna's hubby is in Seoul on a flight. Tomorrow we are headed out to see the Festival of Trees downtown which is so pretty. Sunday will be a lazy day for us where we sit around and do absolutely nothing at all. YAY!

So there you go, Mommy. Life is good :)

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas...

2008-12-07T18:32:00.000-08:00

Everywhere we go!!

In trying to get into the holiday spirit, we've gone to the Roper Mountain Holiday Lights and the Greenville Poinsettia Christmas Parade, and decorated the house. Here are some pictures.

Jakey ClausLindsey in her sleigh
The Santa with a belly like a bowl full of jelly. I thought he was going to drop Jake. Mommy and Jake bundled up for the Christmas ParadeSanta in the Christmas parade downtown.

Then we decorated our Christmas tree too. Here are our pictures from that.

Lindsey puts on some ornaments.
Dan and Lindsey next to the treeMommy and Jake stand on the sidelinesMommy and Daddy with their seventh Christmas tree together.Jake loves looking at the tree with all the lights.

Thanksgiving 2008

2008-12-01T12:45:00.000-08:00

So, with my post-partum depression, I have been very homesick. I knew I was going to NH for Christmas, but that wasn't soon enough. My family hadn't seen Jake and I wanted my mommy. So, I asked Dan, and we decided to go to NH for Thanksgiving, lots of fun. We left on Friday the 21st and got home on Sunday the 30th. We got Jake christened at my church on the 23rd, with my brother Eric as his godfather and my sisters Jessi and Mandi doing double duty as his godmothers. We had a little get-together afterwards to celebrate, here are some pictures from that...

Me and my dad with Jake at the christening party.

Uncle Eric with Jake, Lindsey and Aunt Laura in the background.

After the Christening party, we went to Mom and Lary's house to watch football. Jake was all dressed up to match them in their team colors.

GO RAIDERS!

Aunt Mandi holding Jake (looking a bit drugged though!)

Tuesday, we headed to Dan's mom's house in Wells, Vermont. I love Dan's mom. She has always been so welcoming and so fun to be around. She made us lunch and we finally got to meet her significant other, Bob. What a great guy! Then we headed to Granville, NY to see Dan's brother and sister-in-law and their 4 kids. Tuesday night I got to see my best friend Cyndi, who is 7 months pregnant with her first baby. We also saw my friend Elizabeth too!

Lindsey and Justin, born 6 weeks apart
Lindsey and Hannah Hannah, Lindsey, Jake, Katelyn, Austin and Justin.

Tuesday morning, my grandfather (Lary's father) had a stroke. Very sad. So on Wednesday, we had made plans to see my father, so we drove up to West Lebanon for lunch with my dad, then Daddy watched Lindsey and Jake while Dan and I took my little brother Eric to the hospital to visit Grandpa Bailey. Wednesday night Dan went to play Heroscape with Lary and Eric, while Lindsey had dinner with my grandparents, Jake and I had dinner at Village Pizza (YUM!) with Mandar and my aunt and uncle met us there unexpectedly.

Jake and Poobah ponder the meaning of life.

Ann and Jake

Thursday brought Jake and I awake at 6 am, along with my grandmother who was cooking the turkey. Mimi and Jake would enjoy coffee together while my arms got a break every morning! I helped with some food, and we enjoyed a nice day at my grandparents. Everyone came over for dinner around 3. We had dinner, played Beyond Balderdash (so fun!) and had yummy desserts.

Jakey is stuffed.
Poobah and his boy.
Mommy and Jakey.

Friday morning the four of us joined my Aunt Laura for breakfast at Country Kitchen. You know how there are those restaurants that you just have to go to when you visit your hometown? Village Pizza and Country Kitchen are those ones I have to visit when I am in Newport. Then Dan's mom and Bob came to see us again before we left. We had a nice visit with them. Friday night we celebrated my 24th birthday at Aunt Laura and Uncle Dave's house with my favorite meal...ham and macaroni and cheese!

Daddy and Jake
Jake's HOLY CRAP face :)

Dan's Mom and Jake

Mandar and me.

Aunt Laura and me.

Saturday morning we left for home. We stayed at a really nice Comfort Inn in Winchester, VA, then were on the road at 6 am after our kids had both woken up at 4:30am, we figured there was no reason to sit around when we could go home and sit around at home. We were home by 2pm that day, and it was nice to be home again!

Bathtime!

2008-11-18T05:17:00.000-08:00

Here are some pictures of my handsome little guy.Jakey in the tub---he loves to get washed. Jakey after the tub---not so happy. Mommy and Jakey in their new rocking chair. We love this chair. It is a glider that RECLINES. Nice. Jake getting ready to go out with Mom, Dad and Lindsey.

Life is good right now. I'm starting to get used to having two kids, though I am still having a hard time adjusting. Dan has been super helpful when he's here, but he's just not here enough! Weekdays are hard for us because I still haven't figured out the perfect balance between my two kids. I wonder if I ever will. I want to do all these fun things with Lindsey, but my new little master doesn't let me.

We are heading for New Hampshire on Saturday! I can't wait to spend a week with my family---though I will be missing my Jessi more than she will ever know. :(

I'll post more soon, I promise, I have to get ready to meet a friend this morning!

Gah.

2008-11-09T17:56:00.000-08:00

So I have been MEANING to be better about blogging but I don't have TIME! I can hardly get to my computer because I can't hold a baby and type at the same time. Grr.

This is really hard.

So, Wednesday and Thursday Dan had to work extra hours so that he could have Friday off. Let me just say that fourteen hours by myself with two kids is a very LONG time. Dan was gone from 2pm to 4 am. And then went straight to sleep until 11:30 am.

On Friday, Lindsey had a doctor's appointment for her 5 year old well visit. She was 50 pounds (92 %) and 48.25 inches (99 %). She has grown over four inches and five pounds since JULY! No wonder she doesn't fit into any of the size 6 clothes that I bought her at the consignment sale. Gah! She is all leg...the size 6 shirts are fine, but not the pants. She was funny, she had stage fright and couldn't pee in a cup (apparently it is normal, but it was funny to me) and she got her blood drawn (hemoglobin was good, as was cholesterol) and then she had a hearing and vision test...neither of which were good. We're going back for a re-test in a month. Let's see how that goes. Also, I was concerned about her tonsils and adenoids because she's been nasally, and she's been snoring. The doctor checked, and lo and behold, her tonsils are enlarged. Again, we're going to check next month and see if they have gone down a bit. Lastly, she got her flu shot. I had to hold her and my GOD she is strong. I guess with ten months of not being able to pick her up, I'm not used to picking her up and holding her. She is SOLID!

After the doctor's appt we took Lindsey and Jake to Chuck E Cheese. Jake's first trip to CEC! We had a fun time. Then we went to Chris and Stephanie's house for game night...very fun. Dan is the Monopoly champ.

Saturday Dan and Chris went golfing. The idea was that I would take the kids out shopping for new clothes for Lindsey...but, I'm a genius and I locked my keys in the car, so we didn't go. UGH!

Today we went to Anderson so Dan could golf with his boss and some co-workers. Linds, Jake and I went to Target for some new clothes for Lindsey, and stopped at Denny's for a snack. Much fun was had by all. Now I'm off to play Rock Band 2 and hang with my family.

I'll post pics soon, having some issues with my SD card and my desktop.

Tired on a Tuesday

2008-11-04T11:50:00.001-08:00

I voted! I drove over to Brushy Creek Elementary this AM to vote, and the line was wrapped around the damn building. Insane. So I went back around 1:30 after my MIL came over to watch the kids, so I wouldn't have 2 kids with me whilst standing in line.

I was in and out in five minutes, no line.

Nice.

So Winona is here watching the kids while I catch up on housework and such...AND...I am sitting here blogging.

I'm off to fold 5 loads of laundry. Bet you wish you were me.

Rock the Vote

2008-11-04T11:50:00.000-08:00

Make sure you remember to VOTE today!

Pics of Jake

2008-11-02T06:07:00.000-08:00

Here are some pictures that were taken yesterday by photographer Lila Armock. You can check out her other work at www.lilaarmockphotography.com and I'm sure you'll love her as much as we did!

Amazing.

2008-11-02T04:14:00.000-08:00

It's been almost a week since I was on and blogging. That could be because I have an infant, could be because I am lazy. Who knows. All I know is that my life is pretty amazing.

I don't think I could ask for anything else.

I have an amazing husband. A husband who rubs my feet, who does the dishes, takes out the trash, takes care of the baby so that I can sleep, brushes our daughter's hair, buys me a new camera when daughter drops the old one on the floor...I love this man more than anything and I am so lucky to have him.

I have two amazing kids. Lindsey is a fantastic five year old now! Her birthday was last Tuesday, and unfortunately due to circumstances beyond my control, had to spend her birthday taking care of Mommy because Mommy got a uterine infection. She happily played with her new toys and didn't complain ONCE about not being able to do the things we planned on. She is so helpful with the baby, getting diapers, holding him, watching him while I am in the shower...I'm so happy that she is able to help me, not just for me, but for her. Jake is an awesome baby. He's soooo cute (cute enough to forget what my pregnancy was like...already!) and he's such a good baby. He only cries when he is hungry or when he is tired. He's up every 3-4 hours to eat. He still sleeps a lot, but we get about three to four hours a day when he is really up and alert with us for long periods of time. He has the most amazing blue eyes. He loves his bouncy seat and his swing, and wants to be held all the time, which normally, I don't complain about.

I have an amazing family. My family can't be here in person, but they are here in phone calls, in gifts, in emails...I miss them so much! My life is what it is because of my family, both my little family of four and my extended family. I have the best parents/grandparents/siblings/aunts and uncles/cousins...in the world. I am so blessed.

Finally, I have some pretty amazing friends. They have been so supportive in the past ten months, I could not ask for better people to surround myself with. I love you guys!

All in all, I am a pretty lucky woman, and I feel fortunate knowing that life can only get better as I watch my kids learn and grow everyday in the loving environment that we provide for them :)

Wow.

2008-10-27T01:22:00.000-07:00

I had forgotten what it was like to have a newborn. Hence why I am blogging at 4:23 in the morning. Jake just had his 4am feeding and I am waiting for him to decide if he wants to sleep or be awake, so I figured I would come on here and update.

Jake is doing great. He is an amazing little boy. He isn't a crier at all, he only cries when he is hungry and when he is tired. He's a snuggler, he likes to be swaddled and held for hours on end. I'm breastfeeding, and that has gone really well so far. He's a good little eater, so I'm not super worried about how much he is eating.

I'm doing great too. Since I don't have any stitches or anything, I am healing REALLY fast. I feel fantastic! I've lost more than half of my baby weight, 13 pounds left to go. I'm taking at least one 2-hour nap a day, so that helps out a LOT.

Dan and I have worked out a system since I'm pumping---he takes Jake until 4 am and then I take him until Dan wakes up. It really is a great deal, we each get enough sleep and life is good :)

i'll post some pics soon, Jake has decided to sleep and I am going to crash on the couch!

He's heeeerrrrreeeeeeeee!

2008-10-22T03:38:00.001-07:00

Announcing Jacob Daniel Young!
The Young Family
Daddy, Lindsey and Jake
Lindsey holds Jake for the first time
Lindsey watches over baby brother while he "warms up"

YAY!

Jacob Daniel Young was born yesterday, Tuesday, October 21, 2008 at 11:41 am. He was nine pounds, 2 ounces and 21 inches long.

Here's the story, brief as it is.

5:15-get woken to take a shower, change, etc.

6:00-get checked (1 cm), start fluids in IV

6:30-Pitocin starts, so do the contractions!

8:20-Dan finally wakes up.

8:30-Dr. Lebel comes in, checks me (3 cm), breaks my water (not painful--thank God!)

10:00-Dr. Smith comes in to see me. Checks me, 6 cm dilated.

10:45-My nurse Ashley checks me, 8-9 cm.

11:15-having pressure, fully dilated but baby is not down enough, so we start to push to get him down. They stop me after the first contraction. Apparently I am a good pusher, and they need to set up in my room!

11:41-with less than five minutes of pushing, Jacob Daniel arrives in the world! However, Jake wasn't breathing too well, so it ended up being a half hour before I even got to hold him :(

And now he is healthy and happy. He's been sleeping most of the time, he woke up twice in the night, once at 2 and again at 6. I can deal with that. I'm having some trouble with bleeding, but I should be ok.

The final Hurrah

2008-10-19T14:00:00.000-07:00

We had an amazing final weekend as a family of three. We basically did everything that Lindsey wanted to do, and it was one of the best weekends in my life. I feel so blessed to have such an amazing little girl and a fantastic husband. I'm really a lucky woman.

Saturday:

We woke up around 10am, had some breakfast, showered, got dressed, lounged around the house, then went to Herdklotz Park for play and a picnic. I had some homework that I needed to do, so Dan and Lindsey played on the playground while my trusty ol' laptop and I kept eachother company. I finished all my homework and we sat and had lunch on the soccer field. After lunch, Dan and Lindsey played soccer for a little while, then we all laid in the grass and watched the clouds. It was awesome.

After the park, we went to the Halloween Highway on Pleasantburg Road and got Lindsey and Jake matching costumes...which you will see if you are patient! We had a good time walking around the store looking for costumes, and it gave us good ideas for next year as well.

Right after leaving the Halloween store, we went in search of the perfect pumpkin at St. Giles Church on Hudson Road. Some slim pickin's this year, but what do you expect with our drought? We found one that was "almost perfect" though!

Saturday night was spent playing the Wii, doing scrapbooking, and other fun stuff. We also carved the pumpkin, which Lindsey USED to be a big fan of, until she discovered that she is super girly when it comes to putting her hands in yuckiness (so am I, but I was TRYING to set an example!)

Sunday was pretty great too. Dan let me sleep in until 10am again, and we lazed around the house for a couple of hours. Dan and Lindsey played with the race track, I did some more scrapbooking, Linds watched her favorite show and she helped me make breakfast...eggs and toast, our favorite! When we finally got up and moving we went to Michael's to get the stuff to make Jake's birth announcements and Lindsey got a craft pumpkin to decorate. Then we stopped at Toy's R US to get in the celebratory mood for Lindsey's birthday. She got a crown, balloon, coloring pages and stickers, which made her day---even more, Daddy bought her a new Littlest Pet Shop!

We went home and took a nap, because SOMEONE was getting a little grumpy and for once it wasn't me (Though I took full advantage of that naptime!). After nap we went to Boo in the Zoo, which for those of my loyal readers who aren't in Greenville, that is a non-scary Halloween adventure-y thingie where you get candy.

HERE is my Lindsey with her fantastic costume on...

Like I said, it was a great weekend, but we are looking forward to TUESDAY when our little guy makes us a family of four!

Drumroll, please...

2008-10-16T14:17:00.001-07:00

TUESDAY is the day! FINALLY! YAY!

Had the doctor's appointment at 10:30 this morning. Bad blood pressure (148/92) and bad blood sugars have helped my doctors to decide that it is time for Jake to come out. Got checked, still no change, despite the terrible contractions I have been having. So, induction it is.

Monday night I will go to the hospital (provided that they have a bed available) and they will admit me and give me Cervidil to soften my cervix even more than it is. Then I will be given Pitocin first thing in the morning. Hopefully it goes quickly and with the help of an epidural, painlessly :)

Winona will be watching Lindsey, but Dan and I want Linds with us as much as possible to bond with her little brother. We are very excited, exhausted, terrified...all these emotions into one.

This weekend will be spent as a family of three for the last time in our lives. We'll go to the pumpkin patch, Boo in the Zoo and to the Color Clay Cafe to paint some pottery. Dan will work on Monday, and a friend will come to the hospital with me until he can be there.

Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers!

ch-ch-ch-changes

2008-10-15T18:37:00.000-07:00

I have been stupidly watching the shows on TLC like A Baby Story, Deliver Me, Bringing Home Baby, etc...and I can't seem to stop crying! Now that it is time for me to be delivering my 2nd child, I find myself so terrified.

Our lives are going to change forever. Lindsey will not be the center of my universe any more, she will have to share me with someone else. She's so used to being my only one. I can't even get excited about her birthday that is in less than 2 weeks because I am so focused on getting her brother here safely and as soon as possible.

I am the sister to 3 siblings, but I can't remember a time with out my sisters---I mean, Eric came when I was 13, so I can remember life without him (not like I want to!). Will Lindsey remember life without her brother? Who knows.

All I know is that my life, Dan's life, Lindsey's life are changing and there is nothing that we can do about it. There is no stopping this. Everything is ready---his room is set, his bag for the hospital is packed (with his coming home outfit all washed and ready to go) and my bags are packed. I say that I am so ready to get him out, but in all actuality, I'm NOT! I can't believe how fast 38 weeks has gone. When Lindsey is asleep I wish that she would just wake up so I can hold her and pretend that she is still my baby, because there isn't much longer that she will be. I'm so irritatble and mean lately that I feel like I am taking everything out on her...and I feel like I will regret that for the rest of my life. My daughter is sleeping at the foot of my bed right now and I miss her so much because she isn't WITH me. But when she is awake, she's all over me like white on rice and that drives me insane.

So as of 10:30 tomorrow morning, we will have some semblance of an idea as to when I will have this little man. I can't believe that it is time. It really is a miracle that Jake has even survived this long. My father told me today that five months ago, he didn't expect that Jake would survive, though he would have cut out his tongue rather than tell me that. There is a downside to having medical personnel in your family...the same as it is to be a medical student when you are experiencing a high-risk pregnancy.

Jakey---I can't wait to meet you, my little miracle.

Give me a break.

2008-10-14T08:49:00.000-07:00

On top of all the loveliness that is being 38 weeks pregnant, I seem to have caught a virus as well. Fantastic. Lindsey was sick on Saturday, she threw up three times and was just blah all day. I started feeling yucky yesterday morning...then it go progressively worse until I was yakking every five minutes. I literally vomited out everything that I had in me. So, we went to the hospital (where I should own a time-share by now) and got hooked up to the monitor (contractions every two minutes), got checked (100% effaced, 1 cm dilated....still) and waited. And waited. And waited. We were there for three hours until 3:30 am. Dan and I were exhausted, Lindsey had gone to my in-law's house for the night so she wouldn't have to come to the hospital.

One of the reasons I had to wait so long was that the computers were having issues, so it took forever to get some Staidol and Phenegran. Add on to that that a woman came in at 10 cm dilated and crowning. I wish I was that woman...though I don't know if I could do it without the drugs :)

So now, I'm exhausted and doped up on medicine...these meds make me feel like I am on some mind-trip. I can hardly keep my eyes open, but Dan has to work today...and he goes in early for a meeting! Hopefully I can take a nap with Lindsey a little later.

I see the doctor on Thursday...and we'll be discussing our options! YAY

Mind wanderings of an almost 38-wk pregnant person.

2008-10-12T08:07:00.000-07:00

Ah. Quiet. Dan just went to get Lindsey from my in-laws house. She spent the night because around 10pm last night, I sat down by the tub to give Lindsey a bath, and wound up wet...hmmm. I thought, did my water just break, or did I pee myself?

Apparently I just peed myself.

No, I just have had a lot of yumminess...erm...leaking? So, we went to the hospital (AGAIN) and they checked, had me walk for an hour, checked me again, and told me to go home and go walking today. WHY THE HELL AREN'T THESE CONTRACTIONS DOING ANYTHING?!?!?!?!?!

First of all, I'm trying to figure out if they want me to get this kid out, or if they just want me to get off my fat-ass and do something. It could possibly be a compination of the two. Either way, I have gotten more exercise in the past three days than I have in the entire time that I have been pregnant. We walked three miles on Friday, one mile yesterday, and today we are going to Fall for Greenville downtown, and I am sure that I will do about another three miles or so just with that. I'm really coming to HATE my cervix, and I can not WAIT until I can get my tubes tied so I never ever have to go through this hell that is childbearing again.

What the frick was I thinking? I mean honestly. I would have been so happy living my life with only giving birth once. But NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. I had to do it again. What am I, a dumbass?!

So it is off to walk, have sex, and stimulate my nipples for now. I'll update soon the rantings and ravings of a completely insane woman.

My cervix hates me.

2008-10-11T07:39:00.000-07:00

God damn it all.

So, I'm having these horrid contractions that are anywhere from 2-4 minutes apart...but they aren't freaking doing ANYTHING! I'm still only 1 cm dilated.

I am so disappointed. I'm HUGE and UNCOMFORTABLE.

I'm tempted to find some knitting needles to break my own water.

Is He Coming?!

2008-10-09T17:22:00.000-07:00

Tuesday: after cerc came out, 50% effaced

Wednesday: 90% effaced

Thursday: 100% effaced, 1 cm dilated and baby is in position for labor, hence why I can not walk any more.

They think Jake is going to come tomorrow!!! I think 10/10 is a great birthday to have. The mucous plug is gone, the contractions are 2 minutes apart, and I've started to have some spotting (gross, maybe. Sorry for TMI, but hey, you came on a pregnant woman's blog) so it is expected that Jake is going to make his worldly entrance by the end of the weekend. I sure hope so, I'm sick of being pregnant and feeling this way. Contractions suck ass. They really do.

So, I'm waiting for Dan to come home to help me dilate a little more :) Then we are headed to the mall first thing in the morning to walk out this baby!

Wish us luck!

37 weeks pregnant

2008-10-08T13:59:00.000-07:00

I'm still big, fat and pregnant.

UGH.

I got my cerclage out yesterday. Very uncomfortable (no one tells you that!) and I was REALLY hoping that Jake would follow the cerclage. No such luck, I suppose. So, I suffer on. His ultrasound was good, they guesstimate his size to be around 7 1/2 pounds already. At 37 weeks? Holy GOD! He's going to be a big guy. We did some more 3-D pics but he was grumpy during the whole thing. One of the cool things was that we got to see his feet in 3-D...he has Dan's monkey toes. HAHA!

So, went to the doctor today for my 37 week appt. WOOT. Had my cervix checked (no WOOT) and I was not dilated yet, but I am 90% effaced (thinned out) so I suppose that is a good thing. My blood pressure was SUPER high for me (normally I am in the high 110s, low 120s over the high 70s, and today it was 140/88....ewww) and now I am swollen up like a moon pie. It's ugly, truly it is.

So after the appointment, Lindsey and I went and walked around the mall for an hour. I had to get some nursing bras and then I bought the new Nicholas Sparks book for something to occupy myself until Jake decides that it is time for him to make his appearance.

I think I had my sights set too high. I was REALLY hoping to have him (or at least get STARTED on having him) yesterday or today. And while I am still having contractions, they aren't doing much. Perhaps by this weekend he will come. I really effing hope so. I want my body back!

Tonight Lindsey is going over to her friend's house tonight to play, while Mandy, Stephanie, Janna and I go out for a final HURRAH for me. We're going for Don Pablo's...we figure we should spice him out of me! Pepcid, here I come! I was hoping to get a pedicure as well, but my feet are super swollen and uncomfortable, maybe we might have to skip it, but maybe not. Either way, I want to forget that I am going to have a baby for a little while, and get out with my friends before my life is dictated by a small infant. I have the best friends in the WORLD!

Sleepless AGAIN?!

2008-10-06T04:50:00.000-07:00

Grrrr.

A pregnant woman needs the most sleep possible. Not only is she carrying that little one (who isn't so little, might I add), but she is breathing, eating, drinking and functioning for that little one. So you would think that the pregnant woman could get a little sleep.

Nope.

Not happenin'.

So, I sit here, it is 6:50 am, and I FINALLY went to bed at 2 am, after watching three tv shows and counting 700 billion dollars of economic crisis. I should do something productive, like nest some more. I don't think that my house has ever looked so good. Perhaps I will scrapbook. I'm almost done with Lindsey's 4th year, which was my goal to do before Jake gets here...so yeah. Scrapbooking. But I don't WANNA!!! I want to climb in bed and go back to sleep, but Dan is hogging the bed and has probably taken over my pillows by now.

*SIGH*

So the cerclage comes out tomorrow. Maybe I'm worrying about that. I really really REALLY want to go into labor this week. And I'm nervous about not going into labor. I keep having mixed fears: Either A) My water has broken and I don't know it...and Jake will suffer, or B) I won't have my baby until 39 weeks and I will miss out on Lindsey's birthday. Either way really sucks. Thank God my original fear of Jake not really being a boy was resolved when we saw his winky at the US on Wednesday :)

OK...so, scrapbooking it is. GAH. I can't WAIT to not be PG and nasty any more.

3-D Ultrasound Pictures

2008-10-04T17:16:00.000-07:00

Grumpy faced Jake...look at those lips!Looking much happier---a smile for his sister :)

On Wednesday the 1st we had a bio-physical profile ultrasound done at my OB's office. Our sonographer took pity on this being our 21st ultrasound and we STILL hadn't been able to see Jake in 3-D because he always had his face buried in the placenta OR he had his hands in front of his face. Soooo...here he is! Isn't he fantastic?

We are very much looking forward to seeing him soon. Shouldn't be too much longer now!

seriously??

2008-10-01T17:41:00.000-07:00

OK...so I had contractions lasting 40 seconds every 5 minutes like they wanted. I call, they send me to the hospital. They monitor me, and I'm still having these contractions.

AND THEY GAVE ME THE SAME MEDICINE THAT I JUST GOT TAKEN OFF OF TO STOP THE CONTRACTIONS!!!!!

You have GOT to be kidding me. This is just getting ridiculous. So, I'm laying there, my best friend has to bring me, since Dan is at work and I don't want to get him alarmed (it was 10:45, and he gets out at 11:30, so there was no need for him to leave a half hour early). Lindsey is watching her DVD player, and the nurse comes in and says that the doctor wants me to have meds. They give me 3 shots in the bum, and give me the option to stay or go home. I go home.

OH FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS GOOD.

I am so bloody frustrated. (I've been watching too much Gordon Ramsay and kitchen nightmares!)

36 weeks!!!

2008-09-30T05:31:00.000-07:00

So, I've made it to full term, which we weren't sure if we could expect. I know, I want to get at least one more week out of my pregnancy, but today marks a HUGE relief on myself. I have worked HARD to keep this little guy in, and while I know the reward will be worth it in the end---UGH! He better be perfect when he comes out (and you know he will be).

So I come off my meds today (the Terbutaline and the Procardia). So I'll be contracting. I'm scared that Danny works an hour away, but I have four friends on my "labor call list" so I'm not tooooo worried about it. I know I'll get to the hospital one way or another. I'm all packed up and ready to go, as is Linds and Dan, so we are SET. I just need someone to feed my fish---any takers?

I had that SAME reaction yesterday as I did on Sunday. It is really scaring me. So I called the doctor's office and got the nurse answering machine before I passed out this time. I got awoken by a call an hour and a half later. Basically what we think is happening is that the Glyburide is making my sugars go down so much that I'm having hypoglycemia and I don't have enough sugars, so I get the shakes, the sweats and I pass out. Not so good when you have a four year old hanging out by herself. She watched a movie in my room while I slept it off, and got me some food in my system after I woke up and was too weak to even attempt the stairs. I'm telling you, I have the world's greatest daughter. Seriously.

So, wish me luck...I can't wait to meet this lil guy!

Sleepless in G-ville

2008-09-29T04:06:00.000-07:00

The further along I get, the crappier I feel, so I have a super hard time getting on the computer and blogging. But, I can not sleep...I've been up since 6am, doing what my grandmother calls "solving the world's problems". It doesn't help that it wasn't until 1:30 that I fell asleep. I tried turning on the TV, snuggling up to Dan, counting sheep...nothing. I am so flippin' tired and there is nothing I can do about it. But, since Dan has to work tonight, I don't want him to be up, since he has to be driving home at midnight. So, I came downstairs and figured I'd update the ol' blog-o.

Friday was eventful. Went to the doctors and Dr. Alt told me that she was going to take me off the Terbutaline on Tuesday (tomorrow!) because I will be 36 weeks. The cerclage is still coming out next Tuesday, which is really exciting. I had a fetal non-stress test (because of my diabetes) and Jake got the hiccups. It was cool to hear him on the monitor, and to actually SEE my contractions, because my strips get sent off wirelessly, I don't see them. She also booked another ultrasound for us on Wednesday to see how big the bean is. Since Lindsey was so humongous (weighing in at 9 lb 12 oz) they are considered how big Jake is. Soooo, growth US it is. My sugars are still really bad, so she put me on medicines to hopefully maintain better sugars. Also have an infection, so got antibodics for that. I'm just so ready for this to be over! Thank GOD I am off bedrest now!!

After the dr appointment, I met my friend Mandy for lunch and that night went to Janna's for a DeMarle at Home party...it's these silicone baking mats...very cool, but I don't know if I would use them often enough. Anywho, so that was fun, and Linds and I didn't get home until almost eleven.

Saturday we went to the market downtown and got some more ravoli, then headed back to Janna's for her daughter Hailey's fourth birthday party. Lindsey was out of sorts and I took her temo and she had a fever, so we went home. I had to run some errands, but then we went home and rested. I did homework and some scrapbooking, Lindsey played with her new My Little Pony and Dan did some work. It was nice to be together doing absolutely nothing.

Yesterday (Sunday) was really weird. I woke up in the am fine, took my meds and monitored (lots of contractions, very bad) and just puttered around the house. I sat at the computer for awhile, and Dan had opened up all the windows in the house, which normally I LOVE because it ets fresh air in here. But I'm sitting at the table and sweat just starts POURING off me. I went in the living room where Dan was, and asked him if he was really hot...because if I'm sweating like that, he must be dying. But he wasn't. At this point, I'm feeling dizzy and shaky, so I grab some lunch and lay down in bed with the fan on me. I fell asleep, and slept for 2 hours or so. Still didn't feel fantastic after the nap, but then I went and took a cool shower, which finally made me feel a little better, after FIVE hours of feeling like poo.

I think it was a bad reaction to one of my meds, but since I take SIX meds at the same time, I don't know which one it is. Hopefully when I take them today, I don't have the same reaction.

Alright, so sitting here for the past fifteen minutes has made me sleepy again, maybe I will just go lay down on the couch and try to fall back asleep...

So very round...

2008-09-25T17:06:00.001-07:00

OK, so the nesting has settled in. I feel like I must clean everything to make room for this lil guy. RIIIIIIGGGGHHHHTTTTTTTTT.

I cleaned out the refridgerator today, cleaned out three closets and did a crapload of laundry. I have to do all Jake's baby clothes tomorrow, as well as his blankies and such so they are ready for him when he finally decides to come. I also did two hours of Spanish homework and one hour of History homework, preparing for tests in the next couple of days.

When did I become responsible?

Seriously now.

2008-09-24T11:57:00.000-07:00

What the hell is this medicine doing, if it is not stopping my contractions? I had that back pain all last night, all today...and when I monitored I was contracting every 6 minutes. They gave me 2 doses of meds, and I remonitored and STILL had 6 contractions. I mean, why do I have to go through the pain of sticking myself with needles and everything when the damn medicine isn't doing its freaking job?!

I'm waiting to hear back from my OB nurse to see what they want me to do. I don't want to go to the hospital (especially since Dan has already left for work!) but I guess I'll do what I have to. I can not WAIT for this kid to get out.

MY BACK HURTSSSSSS!

2008-09-23T16:09:00.000-07:00

OK, so I have been having a lot of back pain in the past two or three days. Like bad enough that it hurts to sit up, stand up, lounge, lay down, basically anything and everything hurts my back. It doesn't stop when I change positions, it comes and goes...I'm trying to figure out if it is back labor or what.

It isn't better with a heating pad, ice or movement...the pain meds they gave me knock me out so I can only take them at bedtime, and Tylenol ain't touchin' it.

I FEEL LIKE CRAP!

35 weeks!

2008-09-23T09:13:00.000-07:00

It really has flown by when you think about it. I mean, I have had a really hard time, but it is almost over. I get off bedrest in another week, get the cerclage out and meds off on the 7th, which is two weeks from now. Then it is anytime after that. I'm starting to nest. I cleaned out the linen closet yesterday. I'm going to go through Lindsey's closet today. I made an apple pie this morning, even though I can't eat it. I'll send it to work with Dan. I just love to bake so much!

I had to monitor this morning, then Jake wasn't moving around a lot so I stayed laying down and keep track of his movements. Jake doesn't like me laying on my left side, so normally he will kick around, but today he wasn't partial to the right side, so he started moving again. He's kind of moving. I think he's just running out of room, because I'm getting sharp jabs of knees and elbows, but no big moves. And he's sitting on a nerve I think. The pain was super bad last night, I even took Tylenol with codeine and laid on a heating pad for awhile...it didn't really help, except that I only woke up once in the night to pee...so the Lortab must have helped out a little :)

Dan will be leaving in a couple of hours for work, then I'm doing a lesson with Lindsey (we're on Lesson 41 of 100!) and then I have to do some Spanish homework. I'm trying to finish with my scrapbooks...I'm getting there with her 4th year. It is my goal to have that one done before the boy gets here...so I'm rushing through! Lindsey is really good about the resting I have to do. She takes such good care of me, but honestly? I can't stay down for way too long...it hurts too badly! For every half hour I am up, I'm down about an hour, but still. If I didn't cook or clean, it wouldn't be done. Gotta deal I guess. At least he's further along so I'm not as worried anymore. I'd still really like to get to 36-37 weeks before he is born. As long as it isn't over 39 weeks then I don't care!

Post-Weekend Wrap-up

2008-09-21T20:31:00.000-07:00

Yes, I am still pregnant. It's just that whenever I put my laptop on my lap, my son seems think it is a soccer ball and procedes to kick the crap out of it, so no blogging.

Thursday, we had friends come over to play! Lindsey's best friend Maddy and my best friend Amanda came over for lunch. It was fun. It's been forever since we have seen eachother. Here's a pic of our girls together.

It was a great weekend for the most part. Friday I was a bonehead. All my OB appts are on Fridays, and they messed me up by scheduling me and not telling me that the 18th was Thursday. I mean, I am on bedrest. Dates mean nothing to me. Days of the week I know, because Dan is gone M-F. :) So, when I went in on Friday, I talked to the front desk lady (her name is Julie, and I can't think of a better title for her right now, but she's fantastic!) and told her I would be willing to reschedule (after I dealt with some razzing from her and one of the nurses!) and when she went to talk to the doctor (YAY Dr. Lebel) she came back and said that Dr. Lebel wanted to see me and would fit me in. So that was nice. What was not nice was the three hour wait. The nurse practioner was not there so it was super backed up. Linds did great the first two hours, but started getting antsy and hungry and so we were on eachother's last nerve. However...when we finally got in to see Dr. Lebel, it was great. Baby is measuring BIG. Over two weeks bigger than he should be. Heartbeat was great (140). Showed the doctor the thingies under my arm and they were what I thought they were (yay for self-diagnosing) and there are no worries. The best thing though...after pleading my case, Dr. Lebel told me that she would tie my tubes for me! YAY! She knows my circumstances, and while she agrees that I am young, will do the surgery for me.

Here's a pic of me pregnant at 34 weeks!
Wow I am huge. :)

So after the appt on Friday, my sugars were low after sitting there without food for three hours. *GASP* so Linds and I went and had lunch at Strossners. MMM. And I even treated myself to a white chocolate macadamia nut cookie. Ah, how hard it is to stop at just one. But somehow, I did it. We went home, napped, then I took Lindsey to the Pavillion park so she could run around and play soccer while I did homework at the picnic table. It was fun to watch her run around. Then back home and laying down, as it had been a day of being up a lot.

Saturday we went to the Saturday market downtown. I bought some frozen homemade italian food...ravoli and lasagna...mmm. Good food that is easy to throw together, can't ask for much more. Since we were downtown, we stopped at Falls Park so Linds could run around. Here's some pics.

Dan and Lindsey outside the Peace Center playing games while I took a rest.

Lindsey at Falls Park. Such pretty flowers, and such a pretty girl!

Outside the Westin Poinsett, checking out the fountain.

The rest of the day Saturday was spent at home in bed, as was most of Sunday. We did take Lindsey to Herdklotz Park for about an hour and a half. I sat and watched while Lindsey rode aorund the soccer field on her bike with Dan jogging to keep up with her. Being out in the fresh air was really good for me...and baby too! Dinner was the ravolis I had bought on Saturday...they were AMAZING! Gotta love homemade noodles :)

I'm so mad at my OB's office!

2008-09-17T19:33:00.000-07:00

So, this morning I went on the monitor and I had seven contractions, which constitutes a re-monitor. So I take a demand dose of my Terbutaline pump and then remonitor again, this time with ten contractions. So, my nurse calls my doctor, and they tell me to go to the hospital. Luckily, I had gotten about halfway on my bag packing and was able to rush over there in about fifteen minutes.

OK, so keep in mind that my OB's office TOLD ME to go to the hospital. They knew I had all these contractions because my home nurse called and told them, and faxed them my strip. So I go, get put back on the monitor at the hospital, and wait. And wait. And wait.

My FREAKING doctor didn't show up! She had the nurse check my cervix (closed, as it should be, being as it is stitched closed!) and then says that they just need to increase my contraction threshold to 12 an hour (so, every five minutes).

This is such crap. I mean, I could have kept monitoring at home if that was the case. What is the point of the meds that I am taking if I'm still having contractions? And why would my doctor's office tell me to go to the hospital if they aren't even going to freaking look at me? Give me a break.

Information on Uterine Irritability and Contractions

2008-09-17T07:59:00.000-07:00

So, I have this live feed on my blog that shows where people comes from and where they go. I have noticed that I get a lot of Google searches on Uterine Irritabilty and Contractions. I'm still experiencing this, so I figured I'd give more info.

The uterine irritability is frequent but weak contractions. It doesn't normally affect the entire uterus, just different sides. I find that I get crampy when I am experiencing this. It's not pain like contractions, just very uncomfortable. The doctor put me on Procardia to try to stop this. Normally Procardia is a heart medication, but it is also good at relaxing some of the uterine muscles.

Now, the contractions that I have are stronger than that, and as I get further along they are getting stronger. I have backpain sometimes, it starts mid-back and works it's way around my stomach and my stomach hardens up. I compare my contractions to really bad gas bubbles when you're not pregnant to explain these to my non-pregnant friends. I'm on a contraction monitor that I use twice a day for an hour each. Some times when I am feeling particularily bad I monitor for an extra time or two. The monitor then sends the info to nurses up in Balitmore and they tell me how many contractions I have had. Like this morning I had seven, so I have to remonitor for anything over six, as well as take a 0.2 ml demand dose of Terbutaline. If I have six or more the second time, I have to go to the hospital, but this has never happened before. I'm hoping that it won't today!

Hope that kind of gives those who are looking for more information what they were looking for. There's not really a lot of info on irritability, so I'm sharing what I know. :)

Jake's room

2008-09-16T16:43:00.000-07:00

This is Jake's crib. I have the bassinet stored in there right now until it is time to bring it downstairs when he gets here!
Dan hung the curtains today, he doens't like them but I do! This is the changing table too.
Dresser with lots of crap on it that still needs to be sorted, and the fantastic fishy swing :) Jake's room from the doorway. Please excuse the rug shampooer...Dan has GOT to do that this weekend!

I love my little boy's room! Lindsey keeps going in there and touching things and saying " I can't WAIT to meet my little brother!" Oh my God it is so sweet. I can't wait for him either!

On another silly note, I have been letting Lindsey watch the delivery stories with my on TLC, so as to answer questions that she has. She is super concerned that he will come out "Cheesy" like the other babies! She's too funny!

Holy Cannoli Batman!

2008-09-16T10:22:00.000-07:00

We searched high and low for gas today in Greenville. Apparently the town freaking panicked when Hurricane Ike hit Texas and now Greenville is out of gas. And what gas you can find is super expensive. Coming home from work last night, Dan paid $4.09 a gallon for REGULAR gas! That is insane! So he just put enough $ in to get home, because NORMALLY G-ville is better on gas than in Anderson. And it was, it just took us forever to find a place to get some (FYI---BP on Haywood has gas!) and we paid $3.99 a gallon. My family up in NH is paying $3.54. CRAZY!

We went to Gattitown today to enjoy free carousel rides. Dan and Lindsey had a blast. Unfortunately, I couldn't really partake in the fun, nor the eating of pizza! Argh. I can't wait until this pregnancy is over!

On the pregnancy note, I am 34 weeks today! YAY! However, I feel like this kid is going to fall out any time that I stand up. It's crazy! I only have 2 weeks left on my bedrest (like Gatti was bedrest...lol) but then 3 weeks until the cerclage comes out, and most likely Jakey will come out then too! Let's keep our fingers crossed!

I hate when the weekend ends.

2008-09-15T06:52:00.000-07:00

We had such a great weekend! Friday I went to the doctor and they told me some good things, some not so good things. Good: Jake is growing very quickly. My uterus is measuring two weeks ahead of schedule, so our boy is quite big. If we make it that far, we will have an ultrasound at 37 weeks to determine fetal weight (but I hate that it is +/- 2 pounds...gosh they told me Lindsey was probably only going to be 7 pounds!) and we'll decide what to do from there, if I can deliver him vaginally or if I will have to have a c-section. Other good news, I will be able to get off bedrest in TWO WEEKS!!!!!!! YAY! At 36 weeks they think he will be healthy enough that I can go back out among the living. Woot. At 37 weeks they are taking out the cerclage and taking me off the meds (note: they moved THAT back...they think he will come when I'm not on my meds any more) and then if he doesn't come, they will induce me at 38 weeks due to my gestational diabetes. YAY! So not much longer. Two weeks until bedrest is off, three until the medical intervention stops, four if he doesn't come out. So in about four weeks at the latest, I will have a baby!!

We went to Chris and Stephanie's on Friday to say goodbye before they left for Cancun. We are so happy for the two of them!! I can't wait to see pictures of their trip. They are getting married on Friday, then they will be back next Saturday. Poor Dan had to work until 3 am Friday night/Saturday morning...it was 4am by the time he got home!

Saturday we went to Dan's company picnic in Anderson. It was fun. Good food, Dan won a $50 gift card to Target, and Lindsey got a g/c to Target as well. I won bingo for the first time and won $50 to Wal-Mart. Lindsey got her face painted (a fish...and I forgot to take a pic before she washed it off!) and played on the playground and played basketball and water balloon volleyball, which was cute. I was proud of myself, I sat the entire time. The fresh air was wonderful, we were right on Lake Hartwell and the breeze over the water made me homesick for Lake Sunapee. After the picnic we went to Target because they were having a sale on diapers...buy 2, get a $5 gift certificate. I bought Jake some Halloween booties that are mummys and a bib that says "I love my mummy"...hehe. Then to Toys R Us and Lindsey got a minivan for her dollhouse and Dan bought the Pirates trilogy. We went to the Anderson mall and found a "Jake taking home" outfit for our boy, it is cute...a one piece outfit with a hat, bib and booties. It has doggies all over it. Gotta love sales at Sears! Went to the Olive Garden for dinner (mmmm never ending pasta bowl) and then home and watched the Curse of the Black Pearl while Linds played with her new toy.

Sunday (yesterday) was entirely spent in bed. We didn't move, except to get food from downstairs. We watched the other 2 Pirates movies, watched the Colts squeak by the Vikings with a minute left to go...woot...watched the race at NHIS and enjoyed watching Kyle Busch next to last. Dan took a nap, I accidently yanked my pump out AGAIN...I mean what the hell. But this one swelled up and so I had to not stick myself for a little while. So when I did stick myself the second time, I must have hit a bad place because it started squirting blood and I couldn't walk. I'm in tears and there is nothing that Dan can do, and I'm upsetting Linds, so I take it back out and call my nurse, who tells me to ice a different part of my leg and retry. So it took THREE tries to get that damn catheter back in my leg. Grossness. And it hurt like a bitch. But now it is in for five days and I won't have to worry about it for a while.

Today is going to be spent cleaning our bedroom from this weekend in bed. There is trash and water bottles, snacks and such all over the place. I'm monitoring right now, Dan's reading Harry Potter and Linds is being a pain in my butt...what else is new?!

Pictures from Stephanie's bachelorette get-together

2008-09-11T20:47:00.000-07:00

Janna was painting a crown for her daughter Hailey's bedroom door. It was cute.

Stephanie decided to paint her cat Molly a food dish. It has a goldfish in it and says "here fishy fishy"...too cute.

I made this piggy bank for Jake. It is very very cute. And the pig has a dark blue spot around one of his eyes :)

After painting pottery, we went to the Melting Pot for dinner. YUM! Even got to have a glass of wine which was very exciting. Swiss cheese fondue, a house salad, coq au vin to cook our meat in, and turtle fondue...mmmm. I enjoyed the marshmellows in the chocolate the most, followed by the shrimp in the coq au vin! I thought I had died and gone to heaven...a pregnant woman's DREAM DINNER!

Wow, Mandy sure looks serious...or a little drunk :) Me, Mandy, Stephanie and Janna. Our waiter was fantastic and we had the BEST time! YAY for bachelorette parties! Still wish we could have found someone to take their clothes off for us though :)

High on Bleach Fumes

2008-09-10T17:53:00.000-07:00

OK, so my husband is a fantastic man. He does what needs to be done, whether it be working at his job, doing side work, playing with Lindsey, keeping me company, whatever. But my GOD the man could live his life with a disgusting bathroom. It's been a couple of weeks since our upstairs bath has been cleaned. Gross. So tonight I took twenty minutes to clean the shower (and no, Stephanie, I did not scrub the tiles, I just sprayed that stuff on it), clean the toilet, wipe the counters and mop the floor. Yech. It was bad. So I went to town and now I am dealing with bleach fumes. But at least I know it is clean the next time that I have to hug the toilet due to this unexpected nausea. WOOT.

This morning was a toughie. My fantastic husband set the alarm for 8:30...but why is it that I am the one that gets up with the alarm when HE sets it? I did all of my lovely testing, then started on some homework waiting for a call, and Kelly (my nurse) calls to tell me that I had eight contractions. Remember, anything over seven constitutes a remonitor. Thankfully, with the demand dose of 0.2 mg of Terbutaline, I was able to get back on track. But dang, if this is what I have to expect for the next couple of weeks, it is going to get old fast.

I tore out my pump catheter TWICE in the past 24 hours. Last night I was rubbing lotion on Linds (it puts the lotion on its skin---LOL) and then she wanted her toes painted, so i wiped my hands on my thighs to be able to open the tiny BonBon bottle, and hit the catheter and it just falls out. Son of a...it effing hurts. BAD. But I didn't wanna restab myself so I coaxed the cath back in and bandaided it. So I stab myself in the other leg this morning after the contractions thinking maybe that not all the meds are going in. No worries. Then I go to climb into bed and take off my pants (just to get comfy, you know!) and my NEW one falls out.

Oh for the love of all that is good.

So, I restab myself. Hopefully it stays in because I don't know how many more site kits I have to last for the next week.

On another note, Lindsey is doing GREAT with her reading. I am using "Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons" and it is working fantastically. She read three sentances that had 19 words today. We learned the "g" sound like in girl. She's also working on addition and subtraction. She's doing a great job with that. I am really enjoying homeschooling her. She misses going to school and being able to play with her friends, but it is so nice to be able to see what my child is learning. She's doing amazingly well. She's very smart and sometimes that scares me. I feel bad because I won't be able to do the same with Jake, but at least I have had this opportunity with Lindsey.

Tuesday Thoughts

2008-09-09T14:38:00.000-07:00

We spent an excruciating morning (about 2 1/2 hours) at the car dealership today due to a busted window motor regulator. I'm so sick and tired of bringing my car to the dealership and being treated like shit. They are rude. I am never EVER going to buy another car at Benson Chrysler Dodge Jeep EVER again. I love my Jeep. It makes me happy. But this service department is the WORST I have ever dealt with...and Dan too! And my husband is an auto tech!

Blood sugars have been all over the place today. This am before eating, it was 122 (should have been 60-95) after b-fast it was 135 (should have been less than 120) and after lunch it was 65 (was under 120, but super close to 60 which is not ENOUGH sugar). I give up. It doesn't seem like I am doing anything right. It's aggrivating. How am I supposed to eat ALL these calories when I am eating low-calorie food. It makes absolutely no sense.

I am looking forward to leftover mac and cheese for dinner tonight :) It was super yummy last night. I'm working on spanish homework and also history. It is super hard to deal with classes when all I want to do is sleep. I can't imagine it will be any better once the baby comes.

I'm 33 weeks pregnant today. There's 3 weeks until the cerclage comes out and the meds stop, and 5 weeks until my induction if he decides NOT to come out when these meds stop, but I think he probably will. I just can't WAIT until this is all over!!!

Catching up

2008-09-08T12:59:00.001-07:00

So, I haven't blogged since Wednesday, so I guess I better catch up. All has been pretty good, I've lost 7 pounds on my GD diet...which is nice. Dr. isn't too concerned. Jake is growing well and so am I, there aren't a lot of concerns right now. They upped my meds, but that's no biggie. I'm just a little more shaky than normal. :)

Saturday was spent with my girlfriends at Stephanie's get together at Color Clay and the Melting Pot. I'm too lazy to upload pics, but I will do it later. I made a piggy bank for Jake. It's too cute. Then I enjoyed yumminess at the Melting Pot. I hope that I can talk Dan into going before Jakey comes. Lindsey and Daddy spent the entire night playing games and such, Dan even did some cleanup which I thought was really sweet of him.

Sunday Dan went golfing, and Chris locked his keys in the truck, leaving Stephanie to save the day. Dan got sunburnt :) Then we went to Perkins for dinner because I wasn't feeling well. Continued to not feel well so I monitored...I hadn't been really feeling Jake move, so I figured it was the first step. Well, we got sent to labor and delivery. They monitored me for about 45 minutes or so, then we got sent home. Jake's heartbeat was great, and the contractions weren't getting closer together. They gave me an extra dose of meds and home we went.

I did learn however, that I REALLY need to have a bag packed and ready to go. That's on my list of things to do this week! I bought some travel sized shampoos and stuff, that I can just leave in the bag. I also need to have a bag prepared for Lindsey too. It's hard to get everything going smoothly when they want you to go to the hospital ASAP.

Today Linds went to my father in law's while Dan and I went downtown to St. Francis Hospital. I had to see the dietitican so that way we could get things squared away. I got my meal plan, and my glucose meter. The meal plan sucks...how the hell am I supposed to eat 2400 calories?! That is a LOT of food. My sugars are still high, but they are coming down which is good.

Ham, corn and Grammy mac and cheese are on the menu for tonight. I'm craving some comfort food! But dear Lord, I don't know exactly how the heck I am supposed to calculate THAT. :)

My Wednesday

2008-09-03T17:41:00.000-07:00

So, here's a crazy thing that happened. Big part of it was my fault, but still scary.
So last night after Dan got home (12:30am) I got on my monitor and started recording. I record for an hour at night. I fell asleep to him playing video games, but woke up when the timer went off to signal it was done. But I was super dopey, I had taken a pain pill before laying down because of the back pain. So I stumble into the bathroom (since I'm up, might as well pee, right?) and w/o thinking just pulled down my pajama pants...pulling out my Terbutaline catheter. Ouch. So my leg effing hurts, and I'm asleep, plus, I don't normally have contractions in the nighttime, so...I don't put it back in...I just go to sleep because I don't think that I should be STABBING myself with needles in the middle of the night while I am hardly awake. But i was super nauseous, chalking it up to this catheter being ripped out of my thigh.

Wake up this AM, still nauseous. However, I am running late for my strip (the monitoring strip...dirty thoughts) so I just throw the monitor on, thinking, well, I'll probably have more contractions, but it shouldn't be too bad, and I will just do the meds after I am done.

STUPID.

I get off the monitor, do my catheter and start the meds, and the nurse calls to tell me "You just had TEN contractions". My first reaction was "holy shit". But, at this point, my pulse is too high for them to give me a demand dose, my pulse had jumped up to 130 bpm. So I was told to drink fluids and recheck, then when it had settled I had to take a dose and then remonitor. I only had three after the demand dose, so things settled back down which was really good.

So, to make a long story short, I learned today that my medicine is the only thing keeping me from having this baby right now. Which is scary. I know I was dumb for not replacing the meds right away...but I didn't realize how important these medicines were in keeping my child inside. I feel like a jackass, but...what's done is done, and I can't take it back. I'm glad things settled back down though...that was super scary.