Sunday, July 24, 2011

Potty Training, Day 3.

Potty training Friday was okay. We had two "accidents"...and I say "accident" because I am almost positive that my evil child just wanted to change into a different pair of Thomas the Train unders. Then my in-laws came and took him for a couple of hours and since they were going out, I put him in Pull-Ups to make it easier on them. Probably a mistake.

Day Two was so-so. He really seemed to be getting it, you know? I put Cheerios in the toilet and told him to get them. We went through only two pairs of unders, but we did run around naked for a while. When Dan came home, he was able to help out a little.

Today is Day 3. And today sucks so far. We've had too many accidents to count, and I'm pretty sure he's clenching his butt cheeks together in an attempt to not poop.

As far as Mommy goes: I haven't showered in three days, I haven't shaved, put contacts in or changed my clothes. I am resembling a hairy-pitted, stinky hippie feminist. My house hasn't been cleaned since Thursday, trash is piled up and dishes are overflowing from the sink because every single time I try to clean I hear "Mommy, I have to pee". Just during this blog post, I've been told "I HAVE TO GO POTTY!" three times.

I'm pulling my freaking hair out. I'm exhausted, I have to finish a care plan and start doing notes but I can't even get into them because Jacob's tiny bladder will suddenly give him the urge to produce urine. No lie. As soon as I sit down.

I need a drink.

Friday, July 22, 2011

Potty Training, Day 1.

It's the moment that I have been waiting for since I changed my son's first meconium stained diaper. It's potty training day.

I've been through mustard, seedy breastfeeding poops. I've been through the lime green poops my son gets every time he gets a tummy bug. I've been through the corn, the watery, the varying colors (hey. honey! come look at this purple crap that Jake just had!). I've been peed on more times than I can count, been grossed out by poo getting on my hand, and now it's time to say goodbye to diapers and the inevitable bag that a mom has to carry when her child is small.

I'm armed with 14 pairs of underpants (Lightening McQueen and Thomas the Train), Cheerios for aiming practice, random treats that include some chocolate chips and Easter candy corn (what? I forgot to get a different kind of treat), Resolve for accidents that I'm sure will happen, and sheets for the furniture that I would like to sit on after this weekend is over.

Pray for me.